Defying Gravity [entries|archive|friends|Tags|Memories|userinfo]

[ userinfo | dreamwidth userinfo ]
[ archive | journal archive ]

It Gets Better [Jun. 2nd, 2011|11:13 pm]

[Tags|, , , , , ]
[Current Mood |happy]
[Current Music |"Dynamite" by Taio Cruz]

So in true rollercoaster fashion, I have gone from super low to on top of the world. So that's good :) Sometimes you just need the bad stuff to make you realize something is wrong in your life and encourage you to take action.

I have now decided that come fall, I'm going to travel! So far my plans are to see London, Paris, Belgium and possibly Italy or Spain if I can manage it. That's a month or less and then I'll spend a few months in Southeast Asia, starting out in Bangkok and we'll see from there. So I now have a goal to save for this summer while working which will be encouraging. I've been dyyyying to travel and I'm so excited that I'm going to finally get a chance to do it. I can't believe I didn't do it sooner. And if you live in any of the above places, I'd of course love to hang out with you :)

After deciding this and having a second crash, I finally figured out what I want to do with my life. I think ;) This will be the eighth time I've decided so I want to be sure this time. But I've now aligned my number one priority and what I believe is my purpose in life, to make Los Angeles the greatest city ever (preferences aside, we all have different favorites, blah blah blah) with my career goals. I am looking into getting a college degree in Urban Planning which somehow manages to combine almost all of my interests when it comes to cities. I was looking at the syllabi and websites and dying of love. Looking into Cal State Northridge, Cal State Pomona and USC since I want to stay in the LA area but we'll see what I can get into. Yeah it may take two or three years, it may require a lot of work but goddamn it I'll do it for my beloved city. And for me. Because I genuinely believe this is what I was put on this earth to do.

So I'm really excited now. I feel like I found my soulmate in terms of career. It just finally feels right. I'm so excited to read everything I can get my hands on, to talk to people, to get involved. I feel I can finally commit now and I have so many ideas on what to do and how to apply myself. In my many years of reading books and blogs, I know how to succeed in this and I know I've just got to take the initiative to make it happen.

It's funny, a large part of this revelation came while watching Kung Fu Panda 2. Don't want to spoiler it but there's a part where he realizes that despite a bad past, you can choose to be great in the future. And that's what I said to myself, I choose to be great. I can't help it, I'm an ambitious person and there's nothing that gets me down more than feeling like I will never accomplish my dreams and will leave this world with nothing but regrets. I don't think I've done a good job til now in actually doing anything to make these dreams happen so I want to start to change that now. I feel like I really believe in myself that I can do this and I will do whatever it takes to become a truly great person who really will change the world in a BIG way. I think there's a lot to say in being patient and not expecting everything at once while still taking this sometimes scary steps to make things happen and join things that matter to me.

I feel good. This sense of purpose is amazing. I just do so much better in this world if I have goals even if the goals eventually change. Stuff at work doesn't bother me as much because I know it's just something small on the road to something much bigger. My attitude feels so much more positive and I just want to make every day count and soak up every bit of development I can get my hands on. I want to share my good energy with the world!

With that, here is an appropriate meme: Post a comment, and I will reply with one or two reasons why I think you're great. In return, you have to post this same meme on your blog and comment for other people.

I am so thankful for my LJ/DW friends and all of fandom for providing me with so much happiness and support!
Link2 comments|Leave a comment

Happiness. [Dec. 8th, 2010|09:49 pm]

[Tags|, , , , , ]
[Current Mood |happy]
[Current Music |"She's Got You High" by Mumm-Ra]

Know what's amazing? Feeling happy. I've been thinking a lot about the last year and where I am right now and it feels like I've come full circle but in a much better way. It's been awhile but finally things just seem to be working out for me. So consider this a belated Thanksgiving post.

I love LA and I am so happy to be here. It's hard to put it into words but sometimes it just comes to me when I look at a I Love LA T-Shirt and am filled with city pride or feel full of joy when seeing (or reading about) some aspect of the city I just love. I love the weather that no matter how much I wish it was warmer (my tastes have changed to liking 80s best-but I'll take 70's or 90's), it's still warm enough to wear a t-shirt and/or hoodie around and not feel cold. I love that the sun shines almost every day and that there's no snow and barely any rain (I did get caught in the rain the other day but only for five minutes). I love that there's always something to do even if I don't have the money to do it, it's still exciting and inspiring.

I love where I live right now. I love Manhattan Beach and the plethora of unique cafes, restaurants, bars, clothing stores, cupcake stores (sooo tempting) and surfing shops. I love being a block from the ocean and being able to see the ocean all the time, it's so comforting. And it's so much easier to get up and run when I know I can run on The Strand surrounded by fellow walkers, runners and dogs with the ocean filled with surfers on one side and the other side overflowing with some of the most beautiful, unique and modern houses I've seen. I love that it's so close to work that I can walk to get there and don't have to worry about taking the bus and the stress that comes with that or being stranded at work when it's too late for a bus to come. I love that there's an independent bookstore I can walk to and not only get complementary bakery treats (and coffee but I'm not a coffee drinker) but read to my heart's content. I love that I get along with my roommate and that we're moving to an even bigger space so I'll have both more room and more privacy (which are two of my only issues with where I'm living now) with the same super low rent.

I love my job. I love that I'm in a company that actually cares about it's employees and wants to help them develop and succeed. I love that they encourage everyone to learn and run the business and that they came true with that promise by letting me join the marketing meetings and help with marketing. I love that every Monday I get to be excited to go to work and that my mind becomes full of ideas and happiness at *working* on something important and interesting (ie marketing). I'm so grateful that one of the managers gave me the chance that's inspired me to find a new career direction to something I really love and enjoy working on, that makes me want to learn everything about it and do *more* with it. I love that I enjoy being with all my coworkers, that they treat me well, put me in a good mood, comfort me when I'm feeling down and that I can talk to almost all of them. I love that I'm learning skills in cafe that I've always wanted to learn-including bartending. I'm glad that no matter how boring my job can be sometime or how much I wish the pay was higher, I'm still happy to be here and excited about future possibilities. I'm glad I'm working in a place devoted to media, to entertainment and the power of narrative to move people because it's one of the things I love most in the world.

I love that I feel happy, energetic and motivated most of the time. I'm glad I'm still working on my goals even though I've made only a little progress this year. I love that I'm making it a habit to run each morning as soon as I wake up and that I'm following through with it and that it's FUN. I love feeling accomplished to start off my whole day. I'm glad that I finally like the way I look and I'm taking steps to be even happier with my appearance. I'm glad I stopped trying to force myself to learn motion graphics as a career and have focused on just trying to learn about whatever I'm interested in. I love being able to walk into a bookstore and go to any section to find books to read and then spending hours there reading just like when I was a kid. I love walking home and watching TV on my iPod, only the stuff I love whether it be Glee, Modern Family, Weeds, The Big Bang Theory or my Festivid source. I love that Glee is gayer than ever and it continues to find ways to make me the happiest person ever.

I'm happy that even when bad things happen to me (these days mostly money troubles), I'm able to not get stuck in a negative or hopeless mood and instead work on taking steps to make things better. I'm glad I finally feel ready and willing to take steps to find a romantic relationship. I'm happy that I finally feel like I love myself for who I am and not who I wish I could be and that I feel like I can change anything that I'd like to be different. I'm happy that I know I can make my dreams come true and change the world.

Happiness: it's an amazing thing when you think about it.
Link14 comments|Leave a comment

[ viewing | most recent entries ]