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Beginning of the school year!...Kind of [Sep. 1st, 2014|04:17 pm]

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Even though I'm not in school right now, the beginning of September always feels like a new beginning to me. It seems like a good time to share my plans for the rest of the year and the time to come as I finally have some ideas of what I want to do.

First a catchup of the last three months. In May, I went to a fun Ingrid Michaelson concert with [ profile] beerbad and had a great time listening to some of my favorite songs. Mother's Day was pretty sad and I tried to avoid the media but eventually gave in and just scrolled through and watched some sad TV shows and cried some. One of the most fun things I did was go to Malibu State Park and go to this little pond (not sure what the right word is here) where they had cliff jumping rocks and I went to the highest one (about 30 feet) and jumped off of it. It was SO fun and I had been feeling kind of meh about the world and it gave me an adrenaline rush that made me feel happy and full of hope again. I just love feeling like I'm flying and being that high in the air, I really felt like I was in the air on the way down and it felt amazing. I also went to a fun Harry Potter roller skating event where there was a ton of people dressed up and they played Harry Potter songs and it was just really fun even though at the end the music was meh so I put on my headphones and listened to shippy songs for my favorite couples (mostly Kane/Toews). I went to a Memorial Day BBQ with other geeky/fannish type people and had fun playing Cards Against Humanity and talking various TV shows with people. I had a lot of fun going to see the Chicago Blackhawks play the Los Angeles Kings at the Staples Center in my first live hockey game and I was lucky enough to see it with [ profile] celli and get to see Toews score a goal right in front of me. [ profile] celli and I had a lot of fun talking hockey and various real life stuff after the game and it was fun getting a chance to get to know her better. I also went to see a screening of the Mindy Project season finale and got to see a cast Q&A and later got to meet Mindy Kaling for the fourth time - and she remembered who I was for the third time ever. It was pretty cool and she even took a selfie of her and me. I also went to my second cousin's bridal shower and got to catch up with that side of my family and got to see my grandma's sister as well which was nice and I'm looking forward to going to his wedding in November.

In June, I spent a lot of time finishing my Femslash Premiere and my Premieres vid for Vividcon which was a bit stressful but I was ultimately able to finish by the deadline. I was also following the NBA draft and super happy when my favorite player, Tyler Ennis was selected 18th in the draft and another Syracuse player, Jerami Grant went to the Philadelphia 76ers which has a Syracuse player, Michael Carter-Williams who just won Rookie of the Year and who I slash with his friend on the team, Nerlens Noel so I'm looking forward to OT3ing them together. I also started watching the World Cup, following it seriously for the first time ever and fell in love with the USA team, most of all the coach, Jurgen Klinsmann. Jurgen who was a big star in Europe who won the World Cup with Germany in 1990, coached the German team to a 3rd place finish in 2006 (in Germany) but who loves the USA and lives there with his family so he decided to coach the USA team in 2011 and is attempting to turn the team around so it can eventually win the World Cup with the men's team. I really love what he's trying to do and his personality and I have a lot of hope that he can help us win it all so I began to follow the US team and was in ecstasy after we beat Ghana and went to a USA bar for the Portugal game with [ profile] cenedrawood and was SO HAPPY when USA came back from a 0-1 deficit to be winning 2-1...only to lose in the last thirty seconds in one of the most heartbreaking sports moments ever for me. Thankfully we still had another game against Germany where Jurgen was coaching against his friend, Joachim Löm (who was his assistant coach when he coached Germany) and since I ship them together (thanks to [ profile] caesaria), it was an entertaining game for me if terrifying. We lost by one but were still able to make it out of the group stages where we played Belgium which I don't even want to talk about because I'm still super bitter and prefer to think about how Tim Howard made 15 saves and Julian Green scored a goal on his first touch even though he's only 19 years old and was another young player that people complained about being on the roster and yet was one of the many players to prove that Jurgen knew what he was doing cause he's an amazing coach <3 Anyways, I started out rooting for Brazil (because they were at home, it meant a lot to them and they spent so much money at least they could get SOMETHING out of it), Germany, England, Italy and I also added the Netherlands after I saw their first game against Spain and enjoyed watching Robben and van Persie play. Eventually Germany and Netherlands were my favorite teams as after watching a documentary about the 2006 German team and falling in love with Robben as a player I wish I could be like, I emotionally connected with them, plus it helped that both teams did super well.

In July, I was really into basketball as the NBA summer league started and all the new rookies, 2nd year players and undrafted players trying to get a spot on rosters were playing and I watched the 76ers team do well in Orlando with my guy, Jerami Grant. The major summer league was in Las Vegas though and I decided to go to Vegas, buy tickets for the games (they're cheap) and let out my basketball feelings while trying to meet some of my favorite Syracuse players since many of them were going to be there. I had an amazing time, getting autographs and talking to Tyler Ennis, Rakeem Christmas (current SU player), Jerami Grant, Michael Carter-Williams, Baye Moussa Keita and Brandon Triche (former SU players) as well as watching a ton of players play for their teams. Unfortunately my car had some issues so I stayed longer than I wanted to but I also had fun hanging out with n0apologies (twitter) who I had met at Wincon and we had a great time talking about our lives, Adam Lambert, Queer as Folk and other fannish topics. I was also there duing the World Cup final and went to a bar to watch Germany play Argentina where thankfully Germany won and I was SO HAPPY as Jogi Low and the team had come soooo close to winning in the last 8 years and always came up a little short so I was super happy for the team to finally win it all and I just had such a fun time celebrating, happy crying and joining in the celebrations at the German bar.

Finally I got back to LA and had fun going to [ profile] elipie's karaoke birthday party and then going to a Lady GaGa concert with her where we won free seat upgrades and got to hang in the VIP lounge with free drinks and hang out with hot half-naked boys while we could easily see Lady GaGa especially when she came over to the platform right above us. It was super fun getting to hear her sing some of her classic songs and she's an amazing performer so we had a fun time singing her songs and enjoying the performance. At the end of July, I went back home to Syracuse where I spent some time with my dad, caught up with my best friend and hung out with my cats at home. I also drove down to Pennsylvania to visit my cousin's family and spend some time with my aunt. My cousin is starting her own business so I spent a little bit of time at her shop and we also went with her family and my aunt to one of my favorite amusement parks where we used to go almost every year as a kid so it was very nostalgic to be back there again. Speaking of nostalgia, I also went to visit my childhood elementary school and was bummed to see they tore down the playground I had loved although they are building a new one, it's not the same. After that, I went to Vividcon which I'll talk about in a different post but the Wednesday after that, I had an amazing time going to Six Flags Magic Mountain with [ profile] elipie getting a chance to talk about Vividcon, new vidding ideas and other fannish stuff.

This summer I had planned on taking some courses related to college admission counseling but after a couple of days trying to take them, I realized my heart wasn't in them as I wasn't sure yet whether that's what I wanted to do as it might not be big enough for me career-wise. Thankfully I was able to get a full refund and another thing that affected my decision was a revelation I had thought of while reading books about colleges. I kept having regrets while reading on how I wish I had gotten a true college experience and had gone to a more intellectual school when I realized - I could still do that. There was a college I had first heard about in high school called St. John's College that covered in four years, many of the so called Great Books but without lectures, it's all discussion based or laboratory based as they cover science using classic experiments and original texts for everything. Two of the most interesting aspects is learning Ancient Greek and learning math from classic books like Euclid's Elements which I've always wanted to do to understand more of where the English language comes from and understand the basis of math which I've always though could be interesting in the right context. The college is pretty intense but that's exactly what I want, a place where people want to read and think about some of life's biggest questions by reading some of the most enduring books many of which I've always wanted to read and just needed some more structure and people to discuss them with. I feel like my intellectual development has been pretty stunted the last seven years and I know I need to take a big leap to become the person I've always wanted to be and this college is the perfect way to take my communication skills both written and oral to the next level. I am an ambitious person and I have big dreams of doing things to change the world but I need to build a strong foundation so that I can accomplish that so I think I need to take a risk to go to this college and become the person I want to be.

During the summer I started working on my application which consists of three essays talking about why I want to go to the college, a book that has influenced me and a significant experience that has left an impact on me and I'm working on finishing that up by the end of this month. The college has a January program that I'm looking to get accepted at where by going to school over the summer, I'll be all caught up with the freshman year program and will be a regular sophomore by the time next September comes around (but thankfully I will get a summer vacation right before the first potential Vividcon weekend). The college gives good financial aid so I'm not too worried about the money aspect, the bigger opportunity cost for me is the time but I think the education I'm getting will be worth it and I'll be doing part time jobs, volunteer work and internships during the school years and summer to help me figure out the best work for me to do after college and I always have a backup job as a programmer as well. One of the biggest negatives is the college is in Santa Fe and although the weather is not too much colder than LA (averaging 45-85 plus like 6 snow days blech), it'll still be a big adjustment leaving the city (and friends!) I love to be in a much smaller city with less things to do (although Albuquerque is only 45 minutes away and Denver/Phoenix are semi-close too). But I think it's worth it for this oppurtunity that I can't get anywhere else and I feel like I'll always regret it and wonder what if, if I decided not to do go. Plus I'll definitely be visiting LA during breaks, Escapade and during my free summers so I think I'll be able to survive. Another concern is the book list is not that diverse but I know there are book groups there that cover more classic books written by women, minorities and Eastern writers so I'll be sure to be reading them. Something I'm excited about is they have a lot of sports intramurals so I'll still be able to play soccer, tennis and there's lots of nature for hiking and even rock climbing. Most importantly, I'll finally get to have a true college experience and make lots of new friends as even though the college is small, people are very self-selected towards the kind of people I tend to get along with (minus your obligatory pretentious arrogant idiots) so I'm looking forward to that. It'll be a big life change for me but I think this is the best step I can make in working on becoming who I want to be and for my development to being able to help the world solve the major problems we're facing.

I originally was applying for this fall semester but I was having a hard time being ready for that so I decided to wait til January although I have a plan for what I will be doing in LA until then. A friend recommended to me a friend of hers who has a philosophy PHD and is willing to meet with me to go over classic texts that I want to start reading this fall so I can have some accountability and someone to discuss things with to prepare me for St. John's College. I'm planning on working on doing more reading (besides fanfic of course) this fall as I sample many books from nonfiction to fiction in many genres. I'm going to be focusing especially about reading books about California and LA as I want to work on solving problems in the state and want to become more knowledgeable about the issues surrounding the state. I also am going to be doing some volunteering with various organizations to learn more about LA and start figuring out what exactly I would enjoy doing for jobs. I also have a part time job I'll be working on to earn some extra money. Another big goal of mine for this fall is to start seriously trying to date while I still have time in LA which should hopefully give me more motivation to do it. I'm also continuing to work on improving my Spanish through Duolingo and translating Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone from Spanish to English using my Kindle App Spanish to English dictionary. And I definitely want to spend more time with my friends in Los Angeles while I'm still here.

Another big focus for me this fall is heath and fitness as I'd like to lose about 15-20 pounds before the end of this year. I signed up for an accountability type service which has been good with keeping me on track with my eating and exercise goals. Something inspiring for me was watching Kacey Cantanzaro complete the city finals course for American Ninja Warrior, an obstacle course competition where participants can win 500k for winning the finals course in Las Vegas. That inspired me to look into parkour and rock climbing which are two training aspects that some of the best competitors do. I figured that even if I don't make it, it'd be a fun goal to try to train for the course as it looks really fun and it's something that anyone can accomplish even if they don't have a lot of training when they were younger (unlike most sports). Thankfully there is a parkour (more accurately, freerunning) gym in the LA area and I've already taken two beginner lessons there and had fun practicing in the opening gym sessions. So far it's pretty basic, working on vaulting over objects and precision jumping, jumping from one ledge to another but it's been really fun and a great workout and I look forward to being able to do the crazy workouts I see in the gym. I was super scared about doing a flip from the high ledge into the pit (filled with soft foam stuff) but finally managed to gather my courage and did as well as do some flips on the trampoline. I also attempted to run up the warped wall they have in the gym and tried to jump from one bar to another (not there yet). I've also been into soccer as I really enjoy team sports so I signed up for a three days a week soccer class at my local community college and although it's a bit intimidating as it's all guys except one other girl and many of them want to compete on the soccer team at the college, so far I've been having fun playing (minus getting blisters on my feet from my new cleats). I even scored a goal during a game! We've been mostly just playing games which was a bit disappointing as I hoped to practice some skills work as well but it's been fun and I've been learning a lot even if it's been pretty hot playing during the summer. I've also been keeping up with my strength training workouts since March and been continually adding more weight to my lifts. Food is always tough for me as I hate cooking and love delicious food but I've been making a lot of progress and have lost three pounds so far.

I can't wait for the new TV season! I've been watching some of the trailers for the new shows and have added a few shows that I'm going to check out this fall. While A to Z has a couple of annoying things about it, it also features the Mother from HIMYM and as soul destroying it is seeing her, the show looks really cute and right up my romantic loving alley with the whole matchmaking element. I'm also excited for How to Get Away With Murder as Viola Davis looks amazing in it, the premise sounds fun and deliciously messed up and I will always trust Shonda Rhimes to do crazy things. I'm also going to check out Utopia which fascinates me as I've always loved thinking about how to create the perfect society although the reality show format makes me keep my expectations down. I am also looking forward to checking out Survivor's Remorse which is about a BASKETBALL PLAYER (!!!) who becomes successful and must deal with everything that comes with it which sounds super fun for me to vicariously see that side of things and is produced by Lebron James (who I've come to not hate since he went back to Cleveland) so I'm very curious to check it out. I kind of wish I could watch The Flash because the lead actor is a guy I found SUPER hot on Glee (Sebastian!) but I've sworn off all superhero shows unless it features a female/PoC lead so I'll just be checking out Agent Carter. Mostly I'm going to be listening to friends and critics to see if there are any high quality shows I should check out. I'm really looking forward to The Mindy Project, Faking It and Scandal coming back especially the first two as they feature two of my favorite ships. I'm mostly planning on using the fall to continue to catch up with some well written shows I haven't watched yet including Deadwood which I MUST finish by the end of the year. On the movie side of things, this summer I LOVED Maleficent (Maleficent/Aurora all the way!), enjoyed X-Men: Days of Future Past and am looking forward to seeing The Hunger Games 3, The Hobbit 3 and Annie (love the trailer!). On the sports side of things, my new soccer team is Bayern Munich since they have my favorite player, Arjen Robben, lots of German players from the national team like Müller, Neuer and Götze and my fave USA guy, Julian Green (although he's on loan to Hamburg this year) so I already have an emotional investment in them and will be watching all their games. I'm casually following the English Premier League (mostly for my USA/Germany people) and some college football as well and will be checking out my usual NFL teams this fall (although I'm still super bitter there's no LA team) such as the Bills, 49ers, Giants, Chargers and Jets. We'll see timewise what happens as once NBA seasons starts in late October and Syracuse basketball in November, most of my attention will go to that because YAY BASKETBALL. Hockey will be back in October as well and I will check out some Chicago games sometimes.

Super excited for Festivids! I have about 6 possible nominations at the moment although I worry about qualification for a couple of them but I'm excited about them and the vid ideas I want to make already. Before I get my assignment though, I need to start working on my Escapade vid as that's going to require a time committment and I have another vid idea I want to make for next year that I need to get started on clipping right now to get it done in time for VVC. I have another vid that's almost done that I should hopefully post in the next week as well. I have a couple ideas that require me to stretch my skills that I'm really excited about even if it'll be a challenge, it should be fun to do. Other fun fandom-y things coming up is a bunch of NorCal (and elsewhere) fangirls are planning a Fandom Beach Vacation where we rent a beach house and just hang out all day and I'm so excited to hang out with my fandom friends in November :) I also need to plan out what to do for my birthday in October this year, I have an idea and need to check if it's realistic. I still can't believe I'm going to be that officially late 20s? Eek. But hopefully with all the plans I have in place, I'll be ready to enjoy this time in my life shortly!
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I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise, to fly [Apr. 2nd, 2012|03:54 pm]

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[Current Mood |cheerful]
[Current Music |"Starships" by Nicki Minaj]
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So I'm back in Los Angeles. SO HAPPY!!! There's something about this city that makes me feel alive, energized, inspired, whole and fulfilled. The beautiful, wonderful weather helps a lot too. Sunny and 70s!!! It makes me want to dance on the streets of LA or drive with my windows down and sing as loud as I can (I may have done one or both of those things). It's just really good to be back. I took the PCH down from San Francisco even though it took longer and it was SO worth it. It was so beautiful to see the hills, forest, mountains, countryside, cliffs and best of all, the ocean. Wow, it looked even more beautiful than I remembered especially around the Big Sur area. Also got a chance to check out Santa Cruz and Monterey although it sadly got dark before Santa Barbara. It was really nice to get to see the coast again, I haven't done it since 2007 (with a great WL roadtrip!). The night before I also had fun as I went to a gay club in the Castro as it didn't feel like a real San Francisco trip without that. I had too much to drink but someone who I thought was hot danced with me briefly so that was cool. Also I went to Yosemite a couple weeks ago and had fun climbing 5000 ft of mountains. My legs hurt like hell the next two days but it was so worth it and I got some awesome pictures. I did get lost a little in the dark one night but it turned out alright in the end so I can look back on it in a good light now. The falls were so pretty!

I was planning on going back to college but I've had some trouble getting into classes I need so I've decided to not do that and just try to get a web developer job instead. It may take me a few months so I'm going to look for something more temporary in the meantime. I'm really excited about it! The last month has been a lot of fun learning Rails and various parts of the stack and I'm excited about continuing to do it in a Los Angeles environment. Plus I can't wait to hang out with vidders in the area! It's sooo nice to be home.

On top of it, TV is back! I just finished reading Game of Thrones yesterday and although I tried to start the second book, I finally gave in and watched the S2 premiere. It's funny, when I read the 1st book I thought I would have enjoyed the first season more if I had read the books first but now I'm thinking it's better to NOT read the books. Reason being I'm a believer that TV/movies should VERY closely follow the books so little things like dialogue reeeally bother me when they change things or leave stuff out. Part of the problem is I'm reading the books way too close to when I see the TV show as then I remember and get annoyed at everything. For example, I enjoyed the last Harry Potter movie much more because I don't remember a lot of the little specifics of what happened and just enjoyed it for what it was. But anyways, I did love the GoT premiere. The books made me like all the characters a LOT more and now the only one I hate is Joffrey (omg I hope he dies soon). So that's awesome. Arya is still my most favorite ever and I can't wait to see more of her. Also enjoying Mad Men (PEGGY!) although I'm only half through the most recent episode. Sundays are SO awesome now! I do miss Parks & Rec :( Come baaaaaack. Thursdays suck now.

I also went to see the midnight showing of The Hunger Games and LOVED it. No movie could capture the magic of the first book but I loved that it did a great job staying true to the book (they did the smart thing and gave the author screenwriting duties). All of my worries about the casting were thrown away quickly as all the actors totally sold their characters. It was all really beautiful, fun to watch and great to watch with a group of people laughing, crying and making funny comments in all the right places. And I'm so happy it did amazing at the box offic, I KNEW it would. I'm hoping to see it again once I do a reread of the first book which I read in one sitting back in July. If you haven't read it yet, READ IT! It's so addicting and fun to read. Katniss is SO awesome although Cinna is my favorite.

I've been hard at work vidding...vids that are NOT my Club Vivid vid. OOPS. The good news is one of them is almost done and I'm out of the honeymoon phase so I can devote some more time to getting that done along with maybe some other vids I'm working on. It was so much fun to get addicted to vidding something without a deadline and just be into my ship SO MUCH and enjoy seeing them all the time while vidding. It's good to be more productive vidwise again. If anyone want a vid made to order, check out the Vividcon Auction vidders here, there's so many that I wish I had more money to buy!

I still can't believe I'm back here in LA after dreaming about it for two months. There's no place like home...
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A new start... [Aug. 29th, 2011|12:58 pm]

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[Current Music |"I Want to Hold Your Hand" cover by Chris Colfer]
[Current Mood |excited]

So things have been up in the air for the last couple weeks but I finally know what I'm doing this fall. Unfortunately although I applied again to appeal the decision (with some great people helping me), Chapman once again rejected my appeal. So I'm not going back to Chapman University. At least I tried my hardest to get back in and now I see it as their loss. After much angsting and thinking it over, I finally found a backup plan that has its own benefits. I'm going to be attending Los Angeles City College this fall and then look to transfer to Cal State LA or Cal State Northridge for Spring (waiting on results now) or Fall of next year. I'm going to be taking some GE and business courses this semester (a speech and health class, computer science for MIS, managerial accounting and Business Law at the moment) and I'm really excited to have a fresh start and do well in them. I also want to start looking for internships-paid would be best but even unpaid would be helpful for experience. Basically I want to not repeat my previous mistakes and actually make the most of college.

The best part is the college is near Downtown LA which is my favorite place in the city so I'm going to get an apartment in the city and live there. I'm soooo excited. For those unaware, downtown LA (referred to as DTLA) is undergoing a revitalization at the moment and there are a lot of people moving there along with new businesses, restaurants, etc popping up everywhere. It's really exciting and there's a lot of activism and the like there to try to improve the community. I love the aura of DTLA, it's so exciting and invigorating and I can't wait to live there. I love being around tall buildings, lots of people, events and fun places to go to no matter where you go. I already found a really cool coffee/sweets shopa, cute lunch place with great food and a beautiful bookstore to hang out in. The best thing that's happening right now is Artwalk which I haven't gone to yet because of conflicts but I'm going to the one in September and I'm dying to go. Basically they close off the streets, tons of people come out to check out the art galleries/restaurants and there are specials and I've heard it's amazing. I really want to get involved in the local community to help create more of a community and help prevent poverty, homelessness and any other social problem around here. I'm really interested in learning more/experiencing more of the educational system (for a few startup type ideas I have) so I'm looking to get involved in tutoring and after school programs that help enrichment. I want to really experience what it's like living there so I can use that knowledge to think of ways to help.

Fandom wise it's been hard to keep up internet wise since I've been going to a lot of free internet places (I'm waiting on money to get my own place). I'm working on reviewing source for a upcoming vid I'm dyyyying to do so that's taking a lot of time right now. One other problem is the PC side of my computer isn't working which is causing another delay in getting my vid up. I hate dealing with this kind of stuff argh. Glad my Mac can bootcamp though, probably need to reinstall Windows. I've also been catching up with Breaking Bad which is AMAZING. I stopped watching S3 in a slow part and then of course it speeds up after that episode. The end of S3 just destroyed me completely and now I have no idea what's going to happen. Jesse is still my total favorite and keeps me from being too depressed about it. But Gus is pretty awesome too and reminds me of Stringer in some ways. I really can't wait for Fall TV to come back (GLEE) as well as Mad Men which I miss a LOT. It's not the same without it and it's usually on in August so I miss it a lot (especially when seeing Banana Republic's clothing displays at The Grove).

I am really looking forward to getting settled here and not being so all over the place. But hey, I'm in LA, I'm looking forward to my future and I feel good about the possibilities of life so I'll take it.
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It Gets Better [Jun. 2nd, 2011|11:13 pm]

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[Current Music |"Dynamite" by Taio Cruz]
[Current Mood |happy]

So in true rollercoaster fashion, I have gone from super low to on top of the world. So that's good :) Sometimes you just need the bad stuff to make you realize something is wrong in your life and encourage you to take action.

I have now decided that come fall, I'm going to travel! So far my plans are to see London, Paris, Belgium and possibly Italy or Spain if I can manage it. That's a month or less and then I'll spend a few months in Southeast Asia, starting out in Bangkok and we'll see from there. So I now have a goal to save for this summer while working which will be encouraging. I've been dyyyying to travel and I'm so excited that I'm going to finally get a chance to do it. I can't believe I didn't do it sooner. And if you live in any of the above places, I'd of course love to hang out with you :)

After deciding this and having a second crash, I finally figured out what I want to do with my life. I think ;) This will be the eighth time I've decided so I want to be sure this time. But I've now aligned my number one priority and what I believe is my purpose in life, to make Los Angeles the greatest city ever (preferences aside, we all have different favorites, blah blah blah) with my career goals. I am looking into getting a college degree in Urban Planning which somehow manages to combine almost all of my interests when it comes to cities. I was looking at the syllabi and websites and dying of love. Looking into Cal State Northridge, Cal State Pomona and USC since I want to stay in the LA area but we'll see what I can get into. Yeah it may take two or three years, it may require a lot of work but goddamn it I'll do it for my beloved city. And for me. Because I genuinely believe this is what I was put on this earth to do.

So I'm really excited now. I feel like I found my soulmate in terms of career. It just finally feels right. I'm so excited to read everything I can get my hands on, to talk to people, to get involved. I feel I can finally commit now and I have so many ideas on what to do and how to apply myself. In my many years of reading books and blogs, I know how to succeed in this and I know I've just got to take the initiative to make it happen.

It's funny, a large part of this revelation came while watching Kung Fu Panda 2. Don't want to spoiler it but there's a part where he realizes that despite a bad past, you can choose to be great in the future. And that's what I said to myself, I choose to be great. I can't help it, I'm an ambitious person and there's nothing that gets me down more than feeling like I will never accomplish my dreams and will leave this world with nothing but regrets. I don't think I've done a good job til now in actually doing anything to make these dreams happen so I want to start to change that now. I feel like I really believe in myself that I can do this and I will do whatever it takes to become a truly great person who really will change the world in a BIG way. I think there's a lot to say in being patient and not expecting everything at once while still taking this sometimes scary steps to make things happen and join things that matter to me.

I feel good. This sense of purpose is amazing. I just do so much better in this world if I have goals even if the goals eventually change. Stuff at work doesn't bother me as much because I know it's just something small on the road to something much bigger. My attitude feels so much more positive and I just want to make every day count and soak up every bit of development I can get my hands on. I want to share my good energy with the world!

With that, here is an appropriate meme: Post a comment, and I will reply with one or two reasons why I think you're great. In return, you have to post this same meme on your blog and comment for other people.

I am so thankful for my LJ/DW friends and all of fandom for providing me with so much happiness and support!
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Happiness. [Dec. 8th, 2010|09:49 pm]

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[Current Music |"She's Got You High" by Mumm-Ra]
[Current Mood |happy]

Know what's amazing? Feeling happy. I've been thinking a lot about the last year and where I am right now and it feels like I've come full circle but in a much better way. It's been awhile but finally things just seem to be working out for me. So consider this a belated Thanksgiving post.

I love LA and I am so happy to be here. It's hard to put it into words but sometimes it just comes to me when I look at a I Love LA T-Shirt and am filled with city pride or feel full of joy when seeing (or reading about) some aspect of the city I just love. I love the weather that no matter how much I wish it was warmer (my tastes have changed to liking 80s best-but I'll take 70's or 90's), it's still warm enough to wear a t-shirt and/or hoodie around and not feel cold. I love that the sun shines almost every day and that there's no snow and barely any rain (I did get caught in the rain the other day but only for five minutes). I love that there's always something to do even if I don't have the money to do it, it's still exciting and inspiring.

I love where I live right now. I love Manhattan Beach and the plethora of unique cafes, restaurants, bars, clothing stores, cupcake stores (sooo tempting) and surfing shops. I love being a block from the ocean and being able to see the ocean all the time, it's so comforting. And it's so much easier to get up and run when I know I can run on The Strand surrounded by fellow walkers, runners and dogs with the ocean filled with surfers on one side and the other side overflowing with some of the most beautiful, unique and modern houses I've seen. I love that it's so close to work that I can walk to get there and don't have to worry about taking the bus and the stress that comes with that or being stranded at work when it's too late for a bus to come. I love that there's an independent bookstore I can walk to and not only get complementary bakery treats (and coffee but I'm not a coffee drinker) but read to my heart's content. I love that I get along with my roommate and that we're moving to an even bigger space so I'll have both more room and more privacy (which are two of my only issues with where I'm living now) with the same super low rent.

I love my job. I love that I'm in a company that actually cares about it's employees and wants to help them develop and succeed. I love that they encourage everyone to learn and run the business and that they came true with that promise by letting me join the marketing meetings and help with marketing. I love that every Monday I get to be excited to go to work and that my mind becomes full of ideas and happiness at *working* on something important and interesting (ie marketing). I'm so grateful that one of the managers gave me the chance that's inspired me to find a new career direction to something I really love and enjoy working on, that makes me want to learn everything about it and do *more* with it. I love that I enjoy being with all my coworkers, that they treat me well, put me in a good mood, comfort me when I'm feeling down and that I can talk to almost all of them. I love that I'm learning skills in cafe that I've always wanted to learn-including bartending. I'm glad that no matter how boring my job can be sometime or how much I wish the pay was higher, I'm still happy to be here and excited about future possibilities. I'm glad I'm working in a place devoted to media, to entertainment and the power of narrative to move people because it's one of the things I love most in the world.

I love that I feel happy, energetic and motivated most of the time. I'm glad I'm still working on my goals even though I've made only a little progress this year. I love that I'm making it a habit to run each morning as soon as I wake up and that I'm following through with it and that it's FUN. I love feeling accomplished to start off my whole day. I'm glad that I finally like the way I look and I'm taking steps to be even happier with my appearance. I'm glad I stopped trying to force myself to learn motion graphics as a career and have focused on just trying to learn about whatever I'm interested in. I love being able to walk into a bookstore and go to any section to find books to read and then spending hours there reading just like when I was a kid. I love walking home and watching TV on my iPod, only the stuff I love whether it be Glee, Modern Family, Weeds, The Big Bang Theory or my Festivid source. I love that Glee is gayer than ever and it continues to find ways to make me the happiest person ever.

I'm happy that even when bad things happen to me (these days mostly money troubles), I'm able to not get stuck in a negative or hopeless mood and instead work on taking steps to make things better. I'm glad I finally feel ready and willing to take steps to find a romantic relationship. I'm happy that I finally feel like I love myself for who I am and not who I wish I could be and that I feel like I can change anything that I'd like to be different. I'm happy that I know I can make my dreams come true and change the world.

Happiness: it's an amazing thing when you think about it.
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Brief LA update [Oct. 9th, 2010|10:30 pm]

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[Current Music |"My Medea" by Vienna Teng]
[Current Mood |sleepy]

The good news is I found a job! I'll be working at the new ArcLight Theater in Beach Cities. Really happy as the company seems to value its' employees and want to help them develop so I'm hoping they'll live up to that. Mostly I'm just relieved that I can stop worrying so much about finding a job at least for awhile. It just feels kind of like fate that I found this job and I was so happy to make the cut (it was a group interview and they narrowed it from like 30/40 down to six, including me). It does make me feel good about myself though as I feel it's the best interview I've ever done.

Anyways, my birthday is this Monday and I just wanted to see if anybody in LA wants to go out to dinner or just hang out then. I'm planning on going to Disneyland that morning/afternoon (company is always welcomed!) but my evening plans are free.

And yes, I am still completely in love with LA. Even with it's ridiculous weather this fall. Seriously every fall I've been here it's ALWAYS been in the 70s-90s, always sunny with no rain (except for a morning drizzle or two). And now it's going from 90s/100s to 60s to rain downpours and now slowly back up to 90s again. I don't know what's going on but I'd like my sunny 80 degree days back now. Still getting to run at sunset with palm trees together with the moon makes me fall back in love again.
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Let's Hear It For LA! [Sep. 24th, 2010|09:00 pm]

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[Current Mood |content]
[Current Music |Glee songs]

I'm in LA! My trip was uneventful thankfully and I made it here on time and in a good mood. Already I've had free champagne and cake and went on a little happy run to let out my (slightly drunk) happy emotions. I can't believe I made it and now that I'm here, all the nervousness I was feeling has disappeared and I'm just deliriously happy. I'm going to be using that word a lot because I am in a great, fulfilled and content kind of way. I have a whole plan of what I want to do here and I'm determined to get it. My ultimate goal is to have my own little apartment downtown but we will see how things go moneywise before I get there. It's just good to break free from the chains of cold, boring town with parents I'm sick of and no roots to speak of. I can't wait to meet people here, make friends, see some old ones and create the life of my dreams. Here's the song I've been playing to describe how I feel:

Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There's nothin' you can't do
Now you're in LA
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for LA, LA, LA

Yes I will service that song for my own city. Also last night was great TV night with my comedies coming back!

Spoilers for The Big Bang Theory )

Loved The Office for the first time in awhile. It was actually funny! And it wasn't even written by one of the original writers! Loved that it had heart as well. Thought 30 Rock was less funny but I still love Liz Lemon and it did have some laughs so it was alright. I miss Parks and Recreation, tried Community again but I still can't get myself to care enough about the characters and there aren't enough laughs for me. Also tried Shit My Dad Says which was unfunny as I heard it would be. Oh well. Also loved Modern Family on Wednesday although it wasn't quite as funny as I hoped, as always Cam/Mitchell were amazing and the cutest ever. I tried Running Wilde with low expectations as I have heard bad things but it was surprisingly good! The first half was bad and unfunny but all of a sudden the jokes started coming and they were funny and reminded me of Arrested Development. So definitely watching that one. Catching up on Cougar Town at the moment which has been unfunny but enjoyable and all of a sudden, it was funny! Much like How I Met Your Mother, it took til the 9th episode for me to really like it. Not super attached but I do need more funny shows. Still dying for Glee to come back, I have spoiled myself sooo much for the next episode (I am banned from spoilers after that one) but it's going to be SO good, dare I say it...legendary.

I managed to get my Festivids nominations in this morning thankfully. From what I remember I nominated The Wire, Treme, Little Miss Sunshine, Huge (2010), Nurse Jackie, United States of Tara, Be Good Johnny Weir, Project Runway, The Rachel Zoe Project, The Sopranos, Mad Men, Arrested Development, Damages, Beautiful People, Sex and the City (TV+Movie) and some other TV shows I'm forgetting. I'm so excited for it to begin! Hope we get a lot more vidders this year so there'll be more vids ;)

If anyone is in the LA area and wants to hang out, let me know!

Cause in the sun and in the weather
No one else has loved me better
California you’re the place for me
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Vividcon OMG! [Aug. 2nd, 2010|10:51 pm]

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[Current Music |"California Nightlife" by Mochi Beats]
[Current Mood |lethargic]

Why do every year I come up with a list of things to do before Vividcon and then the week before it, I stop caring about the list and just want to have fun at VVC? Argh it's happening again. I reeeeally need this vacation to happen right now and I'm so sick of all the stuff I need to do before it. All I can think of is the vids and the people and the funtimes and the relaxation and the PREMIERING VIDS!

The best news that I'm super excited about right now is I'm going to LA!!! I've decided to postphone traveling the world til later next year (probably after Vividcon because I totally plan my life around it heh) when I'll have more experience and money. I've decided to focus on motion graphics design because I like it much better than web design as I love motion so much more than static designs and you can can do more flashier stuff with it. Still trying to learn a lot right now but I'm hoping to save enough money to move to LA in October, probably after my birthday. This way I get to avoid the cold weather and FINALLY be in a place that I love with a lot more opportunities/networking in my field. I'm going to be living really cheaply, getting a job asap while trying to build a business on the side. The best part is that I have the whole city to explore and I can have fun just by walking around (contrary to popular belief, some people do walk in LA) and looking at all the beautiful sights. LA is just home to me, down deep in my soul and it miss it with every part of my soul.

I've been enjoying TV a lot this summer, old, new and catchup shows. My long delay in watching Sherlock basically comes down to me being profoundly sick of episodic shows and afraid to see yet another show that fandom loves that I can't get into, slash aside. I'm trying to stay positive though and focus on the two categories of shows I do enjoy: fun, relationship/character centered shows that keep me happy about the world (Glee, good comedies) and brilliant, serial well written beautiful narrative shows (Mad Men, Treme, FNL) that even when they break me down, lift me up in the wonderful narrative goodness. Brief rundown:

True Blood: Getting better but still needs moar Pam and Lafayette.
Huge: Favorite new summer show! I thought it would be badly written and cliche like fellow ABC Fam shows Make It or Break It (which I really wanted to like but couldn't get past the bad dialogue) and Pretty Little Liars but I really love it a lot and even though the writing isn't the best or anything, the characters are. Will (Nikki Blonsky is so great) and Becca are my favorites (LOVE their relationship) and I'm dying to vid them. There's even a LARPing episode!
Losing It With Jillian: I like more Jillian time and more personal stuff with her but the episodes became a little too similar for me after awhile sadly.
Entourage: Still fun, still entertaining, still love the look inside Hollywood. Not liking Vince that much this season but loving Ari's stoyline.
Mad Men: LOVED the premiere! Not the second episode as much but I'm just liking being around the time period and characters and style again. Even the commercials are good/tied into the show! I do miss Sal a ton though, it'll never be the same without him.
ETA: The Real L Word: Oh yeah, I forgot. I'm watching it for the gay and the LA/Hollywood connection and it does deliver on that. Unfortunately none of them are really my type and the storylines such as they are, are kind of boring. I wish there was more single people, having them all be couplely (minus one) is kind of boring. I do have some kind of girl crush on Tracy who is just ridiculously beautiful and I love Stacie who actually is hilarious. Mikey would be my other favorite although as much as I love Fashion Week, it can get a bit old.
Treme: Spoilers for S1 of Treme )
Friday Night Lights: Spoilers for S4 of FNL AND MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE WIRE S1/S4. Do not read if you haven't seen it )

Behind on some shows for VVC, was hoping to catch up on Dexter, Dollhouse, Twin Peaks and maybe Justified, LotS S2 and Fringe S2 but I'm not sure what I'm going to be able to get down. Let me know if you think any are particularly necessary ;)

The weight loss challenge didn't go as well as I hoped for various reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture but I did lose some so it's not a total loss. If I've learned anything this year, it's that everything happens according to it's own timeframe and as long as you're working toward your goals, it's okay.

I'll be at Vividcon around 12:30pm or so on Thursday and plan to hang out in the lobby/go to welcome party/pre-reg so let me know if anyone wants to hang out at all then. I'm doing an all panel schedule except the Queer vidshow (because I MUST go to that of course) and will be taking notes (with my laptop!) on all of them. I'll be in Chicago til Monday, planning on going out to a nice restaurant for lunch and then will go to the airport around 4 PM or so. I'm always willing to talk or hang out with anyone who comes so let me know if anyone wants to make specific plans. But please, don't talk negative stuff about Glee in front of me because it's the quickest way to make me run in the opposite direction. I can't wait to see everyone and looking forward to seeing new people I haven't met yet!
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Cross country trip [Jan. 28th, 2010|10:46 am]

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[Current Mood |rushed]

So tomorrow I'm leaving to drive back to NY. Once again, if you live close by the route I'm driving and would like to hang out or whatever along the way, let me know. So far the plan is to drive along the 15 and then 40 E out of California and into Arizona making a stop for the Grand Canyon (where I will be reading Strata because I'm a fangirl like that) and then continue through New Mexico/Texas that night. Saturday and Sunday I will continue on 40 E through Texas, Oklahoma and Arkansas (might stop at Conway for a moment since it's along the way). Monday or the night before I'll be going through Tennesee, getting on 81 N and going through West Virginia, Maryland, Pennsylvania and then into New York Monday or Tuesday. Should hopefully be less rushed than the last time so that will be nice. Trying to go the less snowy, warmer route. Looking forward to seeing some states I haven't seen.

Some bad news: my iPod Touch broke. The screen was finally so cracked that it messed something up. Instead of paying $150 to get it replaced, I bought a cheap Nano off of Craigslist and am going to save up to buy the 64 GB iPod Touch when I have the money (space! voice control!). Missing my Touch a lot, so many things wrong with the Nano that I am not pleased with but it is soooo nice to be able to listen to music again. Music really is my friend, without it I got lonely.

So busy trying to get stuff done and packed. Will try to stop on Sunday to get my Festivid post unlocked, hopefully that will work out. I will say the one thing I will not miss here is the spectacularly horrible internet that is randomly slow at times. Arghhhh. Nothing pisses me off more.

Anyways been vidding/clipping more than usual and it is awesome. Looking forward to getting some good stuff done this year.
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Festivids!! [Jan. 15th, 2010|07:26 am]

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[Current Mood |nostalgic]
[Current Music |"Mr. Blue Sky" by ELO]

Oh my god, the Festivids are out and they're amaaaazing. You can find over 70 fandom vids here from a ton of different fandoms. I am stunned at how good they all are and am working my way through them with feedback. Go check them out!

My vid is here and it is a West Wing vid of LOOOOOVE! Team Bartlet!! It is extremely happymaking and heartwarming and I love it dearly. My other favorite is an amazing Sound of Music vid which is a movie that's very dear to my childhood so I love it a lot. And it made me cry. Yay Festivids!

More Joy Day was great for me! I was feeling happy all morning with all the More Joy posts, then I got to play tennis singles for the first time and though I only tied, I held my serve which made me happy and then Festivid chatting was SO much fun while waiting for the vids. It's amazing how much a day devoted to joy can make your entire vid so positive. If only every day was More Joy Day! Which I suppose is the point, but still.

Thanks for the Glee vidlet prompts everyone who left them! I should hopefully have those done within a week.

I went to see Sherlock Holmes the other day and loved it! Oh god, the slash was OFF THE CHARTS! Worth it just for that although the story was good too. Holmes/Watson were just so married and jealous and in love with plenty of slashy innuendo and symbols. I had fun.

What happened in Haiti was horrible but thankfully fandom is quite generous. [community profile] help_haiti is a new community that is an auction of goods and services, largely fanworks for donating money to Haiti. There are a TON of amazing people there to bid on including all the vidders here. I am hoping I will win at least one person to make one of my many (8 right now) House vid ideas.

This weekend I'm going up to San Francisco!! I'm going to the Festivid party as described here this Monday. If you're close by, you should come! I can't wait to go and see all the vids and Castro Street and other Bay Area type things. Very exciting.

Oh and my best friend when I was little shared with me with pic from when I was 9ish and it's here, under the cut:

My best friend, me and my cat Butterball Picture )
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Mmm warmth [Jan. 6th, 2010|07:10 pm]

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[Current Music |"Walk Alone" by Heather Bond]
[Current Location |California!]
[Current Mood |good]

I'm back in California! It is a glorious, glorious thing. I am all smiley and happy to be in sunshine filled, 70s weather which is my FAVORITE. After being in the cold for two weeks and knowing I am leaving in less than a month, I am extremely grateful. It definitely has started off my year on a positive note.

My travel experience was pretty good other than my plane being delayed for 30 minutes (which seems like nothing) and having to wait an hour for a bus (I missed one, tiny sign but one didn't show up). Not bad in the grand scheme of things. Very, very nice to have my Macbook Pro, watched a lot of Glee although the battery charge was less than advertised. Will need to look into that.

I am taking two courses this month, Weight Training and Tennis which is part of my plan to get in shape by means of being forced to do so. The first because I have terrible motivation in that arena (but I do like feeling strong) and the second because I need tennis partners to play with. I love love love tennis and playing (in great weather in January!) makes me remember how much happiness it brings. I just feel so alive and it makes me smile all the time and I feel like I'm playing really good right now so it's exciting. I'm actually disappointed that the teacher keeps letting us out early because I want to play more! Also frustrating is we haven't played any games yet and that's my favorite thing but my teacher promised we would either tomorrow or next week. It's so fun and I'm looking forward to playing against two of the best players there. I am also trying to run on the side and be careful with food so hopefully I will lose some weight.

It is good to have some money again since I finally have cashed both my paychecks :) Of course now I face questioning whether or not each thing I want to buy is worth it. What was DEFINITELY worth it is my new wireless headphones!! I had to buy a bluetooth iPod adapter too but oh god no wires is HEAVEN. I don't have to be tied down to my iPod! I can even control songs from my headphones. I am hoping these headphones won't break down in 1-6 months as most of the headphones I get do but even if they do, I got a cheap 2 year warranty so I should be all set :) Frys Electronics = awesome store.

Of course exercising or else the lack of travel sleep/jetlag keeps making me really tired and interfering with my Festividding plans. After going to sleep early last night (after taking a nap earlier) and getting 8.5 hours of sleep, today I took a 2 hour nap after work and almost missed dinner. I am getting increasingly worried about my lack of progress with this vid. I am in the bad stage now where the deadline is not encouraging me to vid and instead making me feel resentful and I'm kind of hating the vid even though when I watch it, I do like it. I don't know it's frustrating. I'm not worried about the deadline because I have Friday-Sunday free and I can bang it out then if I can't find the time in the next two days but I reeeally wanted to get it done sooner so I wouldn't get freaked out about missing the deadline and/or not allow the vid to be as good as I want it to be. Hopefully I'll be able to get it done soon.

I find it so weird how in the midst of ship love (cause honestly that's what it is), I can read so much fic and when I don't have one, I have almost zero desire to read any fic no matter how much I love a ship or author. Oh well, I guess, I'm sure the urge will hit me at some point.

I am just glad that right now I am feeling optimistic, getting things done for the most part and generally am in a positive mood. I had forgotten how much exercise helps with that. As well as being in the best place on earth of course :D
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2010! [Jan. 1st, 2010|11:11 pm]

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[Current Mood |productive]
[Current Music |Kate Earl]

Happy First Day of 2010 everyone!

I am feeling so good about this year. I know I usually always say that but this one feels like a great setup. I am getting work done on my Festivids vid! The process is pretty easy which is fantastic. It is so nice having vidding be so easy with big thanks to great tech. And of course today I find the *perfect* vid idea for The Office. It sucks that this was the season where I fell out of love with the show although this song is so perfect I might have to do it. It reminds me why I fell in love with the show. I'm really hoping I'll get a lot of Glee vidding done this year because I feel it's my second chance to truly vid a show I'm in love with right when I'm in love with it. I'm still bummed I didn't vid The Office as much as I wanted back in the day not to mention other fandoms that have come and gone. But I am feeling very vid inspired and productive so hopefully that will change this year. I want to do the end of the year vid meme next year!

Really missing California and can't wait to go back. Warm weather and palm trees and sunshine will be sooo nice. I even miss the freeways although not so much the slowness of them. It is just weird not having five way lanes here, it feels deserted. I leave Monday morning and am hoping my return flight experience will be a better one. It will help having a laptop that doesn't need power adapter all the time and having less stuff to bring (no more big speakers and external DVD player!). I am planning on putting in some vidding and TV time :)

Still have to watch the last two Doctor Who episodes which considering I've seen the preview, says a lot about how much I care about the show. Was extremely bored by Water of Mars, wish I had only seen the last 10 minutes or so. Oh well. Have started watching Twin Peaks and like it a lot. I know Dale Cooper from Sex in the City and Desperate Housewives so that's a bit distracting but he's soooo pretty when he's young. Also he's the llama guy from I think the 2005 Premiere intro vid. I love the mystery and am looking forward to seeing what happens. The music is some of the eeriest music I've ever heard.

It is sooo nice working on a vid on a deadline but not feeling rushed or stressed. If only every deadline situation could be like that.
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Back Home [Sep. 1st, 2009|08:36 am]

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[Current Mood |okay]
[Current Music |"Comes and Goes in Waves" by Greg Laswell]

So I'm back at Chapman. I got in Sunday night at 10 pm Pacific time and was just glad to finally make it here. Sunday morning started good with the beeeeeeautiful Colorado mountains which I fell instantly in love with and Utah had some amazing ones as well. But I got sick of driving on them and driving in general so it just got bad after that with the exception of Las Vegas which I drove around in for 10 minutes and was taken by all the crazy grandiose stuff they have there. But yeah, first I almost run out of gas because I wasn't paying attention and then in California it got really congested and full of idiot cars swerving in and out and I just wanted to get home and it sucked a lot. It's a wonder how much Bale Out will describe your mood. But I was focused on getting back to Chapman that night and made it home and it was so beautiful seeing everything again for the first time driving. We Are The Champions was my mood music then.

Of course, then my ID card didn't work to get me into my room so I had to go through an hour process of trying to get it to work and then having to prop my door open to bring my essential stuff in. Not a good day. Thankfully yesterday was much better. I woke up and met the person who I'm sharing a bathroom with who is really cool, likes Dexter and we get along pretty well so it's nice to finally have a roommate whose a bit more like me. Definitely think I might have a fun so happy about that. I also got in off the waitlist of a class I reeeally wanted to take, Foundation Course in Design and was SO excited at the first project which is the collage type thing that I have a ton of ideas for. Good to be excited about a class and get a feeling that it fits me perfectly. Got my ID fixed and then had lunch in the new dining hall which is amaaaazing. It's huge with pretty lights and giant art murals and cute booths and I love it a lot. The new building where I live is generally awesome and I can't wait to try the rock climbing wall.

My other two classes were okay, History of Political Philosophy is where I'm excited about the content and there's not a ton of work and I like my Dancing in World Cultures professor a lot (funny and cool is a good combination) so at least some of the writing for that will be worth it. Then I was going to a floor dining together dinner thing but we took too many people on the elevator and got stuck on the second floor for 30 minutes. Not fun in a lot of heat, I can tell you that. Then I had my Introduction to Graphic Design class which was...intense. Really scared for it as it's all, this is the real world, everything has to be professional, lots of assignments, etc etc. I just really want to do well more than any class I've ever taken so it's a lot of pressure. Thankfully I could go back to my single room and get some alone time and enjoy some Adam who makes everything better.

Way behind on my Flist and still have to get stuff from storage and apply for jobs and a bunch of other housekeeping things but thankfully I only have one class today so I have lots of time. I'm a bit overwhelmed though, there's so much to do and so much to learn and I don't know how I'm going to do it all. It is really nice to be back in California, it makes me happy and I have a wonderful view from my floor where you can see the city.
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Road trip! Road Trip! [Aug. 26th, 2009|02:57 pm]

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[Current Music |"Beautiful Dirty Rich" by Lady Gaga]
[Current Mood |excited]

Soooo...change in plans. Instead of flying on Friday to California, I am DRIVING there tomorrow in my car!!! OMFG. I'm going to see so many states I've never seen before which is exciting. I've never driven for such a long time and all by myself and holy crap, this is actually happening!

The plan is to drive through NY, Ohio (Cleveland), Indiana, Illinois (Chicago) and Iowa on Thursday, Nebraska (Omaha), Colorado (Denver) and Utah on Friday and the rest of Utah, Nevada (Las Vegas) and California (!!) on Saturday. Of course this is subject to change based on how long I can drive and whatever else happens but yeah, going to be a long ride. If anybody is along that route (highways 90, 80, 70, 15) and wants to meetup for lunch/dinner or whatever, let me know. Going to bring LOTS of podfic (recs welcome especially long ones!) and audiobooks so I should have plenty to listen to.

I am SO psyched to have a car in the fall! The amount of freedom I'll have, to go wherever I want and not have to worry about getting around is so amazing. I'm overwhelmed right now by that and the fact that school starts in less than a week! Gah. Really exciting though. Of course I'll be without internet most of the time so don't expect activity from me then.

Eeee road trip! *sings* See the USA in your Chevrolet...Too bad I don't have an Impala ;)
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Fandom Love (Mad Men, Project Runway, Adam/Kris) + College [Aug. 23rd, 2009|02:38 pm]

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[Current Mood |excited]
[Current Music |VVC vids]

Mad Men's back YAY! I got a download from the hotel and watched it Monday morning and have resisted getting too into it before I finished all my VVC writeups (okay I do have a couple more coming but those are not as much write asap). But here's my episode thoughts on the third season premiere!

Spoilers for Mad Men 301 )

I love this show. I love that it doesn't do what I expect, I love that it uses metaphors, I love the slowness, I love the prettyness, I love all the characters (or love to hate) and I love the history of it. And I'm so psyched that we're going to get more Sal this season! As I said at VVC, if this is the way fall TV is going to treat me, I'm going to be a very happy person this fall.

It is SO good to see the Mad Men fandom giving Sal some love. Makes me super happy :D
Links: Great Bryan Batt (Sal) interview
Old Hollywood Comparisons with Mad Men
Bryan Batt at Times Square

I am so jealous of the people who got to see Mad Men in Times Square. I love seeing Bryan Batt there and the communal viewing is so cool. I wish there was a lot more of that kind of opportunity in the world.

More Mad Men tonight OMGYAY!

And then Project Runway came back which I'm super excited about!

Spoilers for Project Runway 601 )

And then I've fallen more and more in love with Adam, Kris and Adam/Kris. Been reading some wonderful fanfic at night. My favorite so far is Apples Are Not The Only Fruit (Adam/Kris AU, NC-17) which makes me SO HAPPY. Like watching Save The Last Dance over and over again, bouncy squee kind of delight. It just perfectly captures fan squee and has a wonderful slow buildup and is basically perfect. They're just SO CUTE! It reminded me of Seduction of the Desert Prince and not just because of the fruit love. Also I loved The Fairytale Story of Adam and Kris (Picspam with captions) which is filled with hearts and flowers and sparkly unicorns!

I am just experiencing am overload of fannish squee right now with vidding/Vividcon, Mad Men, Project Runway, Adam/Kris and yes, The West Wing, I am still madly quite in love with my show. To add to that, now that Vividcon is over, it is beginning to hit me that I'm going back to college in a week OMG! Well, Friday actually. I'm the most excited I think I have ever been this year mostly because I am doing a major I'm really interested in learning about AND I have my own room (and soon car eeeeee). And I know I'm so very privileged for getting all this which is why I'm so over the moon in getting it. I just really *need* a place to myself even if it's only to be able to ask over friends and not have to apologize to a roommate for it or to be able to dance crazy and not fear a roommate walking in. Plus I'm super excited to be back in California and SoCal and with a car, I can actually explore it so much better! And this year I really want to focus on creative pursuits and getting marriage equality in CA and I'm super excited about doing both. I'm going to the OutWest Bootcamp at USC in September and I can't wait to learn more about running campaigns (in terms of overturning Prop 8).

I can just feel that this year is going to be amazing and I feel so much more in control of who I am and what I want to be. Getting my VVC reports done for once helped show I can get things accomplished even overwhelming, tempted to procrastinate ones. I know I can create the life I want and I'm excited to be on this journey and just, yay life! It is truly an awesome thing right now.
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From LA to NY [Jun. 3rd, 2009|08:12 pm]

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[Current Music |vid songs]
[Current Mood |content]

So back in Syracuse again. Ehh. The worst is seeing events in LA and not being able to go to them like the Paley event with Hugh Laurie. At least it's not the whole cast/crew I guess. I keep reminding myself that this should be the last summer I have to do this. The good thing is I get to see my kitties again :)

I went to LA the night before I left and had an AMAZING time. First I went to The Kills concert, didn't have a ticket since I just learned about it but I hoped to score one and did. It was easy actually, didn't even have to ask. But it was my first real concert and I had a blast. I did have to stand through two hours of other bands and wait for awhile for them to appear but when they did it was one of the best experiences of my life. Cause let me tell you, The Kills in concert are AWESOME. They played a whole bunch of my favorite songs like URA Fever, Sour Cherry, Cheap and Cheerful, Alphabet Pony, Black Balloon (someone actually had a black baloon!), Fried My Little Brains and No Wow among others. I wished they had played Cat Claw and What NY Used to Be but was happy with what I got especially Sour Cherry. I just loved the energy of being with all the other fans and singing along and most of all getting to see the artists perform. They are just so amazing in terms of charisma and sexiness and really getting into the music. And they'd get close to us, I was in the fourth row or so and a few times it looked like he was looking at me even if he wasn't. It's so indescribable. And after they left, we made a lot of noise and they came out again and played Hook and Line and another song with the other band, The Horror. Towards the end they fell on the floor and got all tangled up in each other, it was funny. I can definitely get now why people go to concerts, I must go to more.

Then I biked to Factory Nightclub in West Hollywood which wasn't too far. I liked it a lot, very big, had big screens like Club Vivid with pretty lights and confetti and many pretty boys :) It started out perfect too as I was high from the concert and went up to the bar and started talking with Jonathan who was super nice to me and we talked about a couple things before he hugged me and left. Then I gulped down a drink and went out to dance and just was transported to a place where I could dance my heart out and not care what anyone thought. They played a Lady Gaga song (not Just Dance breaking my clubbing record at four but I came in late so I'm sure I missed it) and best of all, Girlfriend so I could yell out the words pretending it was the House vid up on the screen. They also played Circus which was SO much fun not only because I imagined it being the Star Trek vid but because I accidentally hit this guy (not the good part) and then he came over to dance with me and it was so much fun. I danced to they chased us out and I'm sure part of the free part was the alcohol but it just felt like one of the best experiences of my life. Mmmm.

Of course the crappy part came after that when I had some trouble getting home since the freaking subways close in LA at night...don't even get me started. I decided to bike down to try to catch the bus I needed to took longer than I thought. It was nice to see some of LA though and I managed to catch the Downtown Disney bus so it all worked out in the end. Managed to get a few hours of sleep before I had to get up to pack and take my stuff to storage. Barely managed that in time but I got home alright so it all turned out okay.

I got my job back as soon as I came home so at least I'll have some money. Been working this week in the morning and then going home and napping in the afternoon. Last Tuesday I went to Buffalo to visit my grandma since she had a seizure earlier in month and wasn't doing so well although she was home with people taking care of her. She can't really talk except for a few hard to understand words (think Failure to Communicate) but can see and understand people talking. It's so sad to see her that way :( Makes me appreciate my life and health more at least. Finally got internet there last Sunday (see West Wing post). Also spent some time with my cousin (first removed) and she was really nice. Turns out we both watch Ugly Betty and like Harry Potter so that was fun to talk about. Also in other family news, my favorite cousin is pregnant and due in August so that'll be the first baby of the family I know. I don't know what to think, we'll be cousins first removed but I like my cousin much more than my brother so I care more about this kid than any other ones. We'll see what happens.

In good Chapman news, my new major got approved! And I did really well with grades, much better than I thought :) Got two A's, an A- and a B+ so I'm really happy with that since two of my professors must have been very kind to me. A bit worried about money for next year but hopefully that should work out alright. Next year I'm taking Introduction to Graphic Design, Computer Science II, History of Political Philosophy, Foundation Course in Photography and Dance in World Cultures (GE). I'm looking forward to it although bummed I can't take History of Television (same time as major class, too many credits unless I wanted to overload myself).

Trying to work on my Premiere vid and not freak out about time and getting it done. The Vividcon schedule came out and once again I'm forced to make tough decisions between panels and vidshows. Probably going to do all panels except my own of course (I'll need to find someone to take detailed notes on Vid Watching 101-price I pay) but it's so frustrating to have to choose between Also Premiering and Understanding Audience *sigh* Ah well, better to have too much to do than the opposite. Had another vid idea for The Wire which I do like but it's so frustrating that I keep getting ideas that aren't what I want: interesting exploration of the people and ideas expressed in the show.

Reeeally hoping Federer will win the French Open this year! Nadal left it open for him so I'm calling it as fate for him to beat Pete's record by winning the only grand slam that Sampras never won. God, how I love them. Hope he doesn't let me down!
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Catchup [Apr. 22nd, 2009|01:42 pm]

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[Current Music |"Walk On" by U2]
[Current Mood |stressed]

Miraculously I am caught up on my Flist. Remind me to never do that again. Thank god for being able to read all entries on a certain date. Also mostly caught up with TV, did some of that in Florida which was great. House was very happymaking and it was so good to watch it with [ profile] indybaggins and squee over the House/Wilson stuff together. I could never break up with that show <3

Anyways, I had a fun, wonderful vacation in Daytona Beach, Orlando and Miami with all my friends, old and new. I finally went to Disneyworld which I've wanted to do since I was a kid. Back in the day, everyone at school would always go for vacation and I never did and always wanted to. My best friend went instead of going to my birthday party which always made me sad so now I finally got to experience it. I visited all four parks, went on most of the rides and got to meet Timon and Rafiki (lots of Lion King love there) so I was happy. Favorites were the Aerosmith roller coaster (LA!), Soarin' (CA!) and the Everest mountain roller coaster. Also had fun at the Daytona Water Lagoon and Daytona Cubs game as well as seeing the pretty, pretty Miami beach and South Beach. I made it home alright to CA thankfully with a small travel curse mishap at the end but it was okay in the end thankfully. I took lots of video with my shiny new Flip Mino video camcorder that I'll share later in the week.

It is nice being back in CA and not having to go back to cold weather (in fact it was really hot). Unfortunately I am really overwhelmed with school right now and on top of that I have a Club Vivid vid to make in nine days. I don't know how I'm going to do it. I'm feeling really frustrated because I'm having a hard time doing any college work and it feels like a repeat of my freshman year and I'm really, really worried I'm going to mess up again. It just feels so much easier right now to ignore it and hope it goes away even when I know that's a really bad idea. I'm behind on this one class and I try to read and focus on it and I get distracted and start not caring at all. It's so hard to get out of vacation mode. I have this one assignment due late tonight and I hope to god I can figure out since it's really hard. I do have lab today so I can ask my professor for help.

We had this TV class night where graduates from my school with jobs in the industry came back to talk about it which I was hoping would inspire me and it did a little early but at the same time scares me if I can even hope to find a place for me in there. I still find it so frustrating not knowing what I want to do for a career. I just want to do something I enjoy but it feels like nothing I enjoy doing can be done for work. I just wish I could stop constantly career angsting but at the same time I really wish I had the motivation to know THIS is what I want to do.

I'm definitely moving to Dreamwidth on April 30th although I'll still be crossposting to LJ and have comments open. I'm probably getting a permanent account if I can get the money. I'm just so glad there's finally a journal service that has improved features, listens to its users and won't pull the crap that LJ did with Strikethrough and similar as I trust its founders.

Thanks so much for all the comments about my grandmother, I really appreciate it. Unfortunately it doesn't look good as she has an agressive brain tumor with a very low survival rate/remission. I can't really believe this is happening, I usually can't deal with this kind of stuff unless I can see/hear it. I just hope for the best right now.

On a Vividcon note, I'm doing my first vidshow this year! It's called Motion Roller Coaster and here's the description:

Showcasing vids that feature a strong emphasis on motion, from external to internal, from found within the source to created, and for thematic, musical, emotional, and just plain shiny reasons. Get ready for a ride in every direction!

Please suggest any vids with a lots and lots of motion here or just fill out this poll and I'll check them out.

[Poll #1388224]
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San Diego and Florida [Apr. 11th, 2009|05:24 am]

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[Current Mood |excited]

So I'm leaving this morning for Florida and I'm super excited. Just wanted to do a brief update. Went to San Diego for the last few days because I needed to get out of here for awhile and had a great time. I biked down the coast most of the way from Oceanside and the ocean was soooo pretty, best way to travel. The whole trip made me fall in love with California again and its beauty. I also saw most of the San Diego Zoo, the Wild Animal Park and Seaworld so that was fun. Looking forward to spending time with [ profile] deejay, [ profile] clayangel, [ profile] blackstray and [ profile] indybaggins in Florida and checking out Disney World for the first time as well as Miami.

LOVED The Office this week, both episodes reminded me why I love this show. And loved Dollhouse again this week, 107 finally made me love the show and this week's episode got me to care about the characters and kept me intrigued with the plot so I'm happy. Parks and Recreation was alright, it got better towards the end so I'll see if the potential plays out better in future episodes. I just hope we get more heart and less of a S1 Office feel.

Let's hope the travel curse doesn't strike me again. I'll be checking my email and LJ as much as I can.
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California [Feb. 1st, 2009|09:17 am]

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[Current Music |"The Investigation" by Sugarcult]
[Current Mood |happy]

I am now in California. It is GLORIOUS. I'm all settled in my new room. The good news is apparently my roommate is never around so I'm going to have the bedroom mostly to myself \o/ Just what I wanted. Know what I'm wearing right now? Pants and a t-shirt...and I'm HOT. It is amazing and wonderful. I had to take off my long sleeve t-shirt last night and it made me so happy. I walked around campus with only a light coat! I'm NOT shivering or all bundled up trapped in the whip of cold. These are beautiful pleasures I have missed so much.

The bad news is I missed my flight by five minutes due to a variety of factors (like say two baggage checks, bad snowy weather - gotta love that travel curse) so I didn't get to go to the California Museum of Photography after all :( At least I had my laptop and free wireless internet to keep me company. Number of times I almost started crying/cried during the flights over? Too many to count. It's just...I made it back to my favorite place in the world! I'm home and I love my city so, so much. I see palm trees out my window! Taking the shuttle back, I kept looking out the window in wonder. Nothing can ruin my glee at being here, nothing. By chance, I met the RA right when I got to the apartments and so I was checked in, no problem. The two roommates I've met have both seen nice too. I walked around Chapman today and it was just as beautiful as usual. They did add these beautiful colored lights at this fountain thing AND a new swimming pool which I can't wait to try out (brief pause to consider swimming outside in February). I really love it here.

Today I am heading out to Venice Beach as I miss it desperately and want to again walk around like I did my first time here. Full circle and all that. Plus I need to do some shopping for footwear (and a new cellphone, again). It'll just be great to see all the creativity and the beautiful beaches. I will have to miss most of the Superbowl but I'll be back in time to see the end of it and The Office (*SQUEE*) so I don't mind.

Brief BSG Spoilers for The Oath )
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Going Back Home to California [Jan. 31st, 2009|12:29 am]

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[Current Mood |hopeful]
[Current Music |"California" by Rogue Wave]

So I got back from Inauguration last week which was a memorable experience. I plan to write up a report on Sunday but the short version is, I hung out at the MSNBC station and met Rachel Maddow who is super nice, hung out with a new friend all night first in line (fence really) of the non-ticketers with freezing feet (but everything else fine mostly), saw the inauguration in person which was amazing even far away and got kind of lost in the massive crowds. Made it home sick but after a day of rest felt better. Sorry I haven't been around or posted, just got in one of my withdraw-y moods.

The best news is I'm going back to Chapman tomorrow :D Everything seems to be working out and I have an apartment to go to. I really can't wait, there are no words for how much I've missed California and my college. I can't wait to be with the sun, the warmth, the palm trees, the pretty buildings, the industry, the ocean, the feelings of discovery and beauty and creativity and innovation and hope. Yes, that. I can't wait to start classes, I can't wait to meet people, I can't wait to experience and learn and have fun. I finally feel that this is where I'm meant to be and this is the way to do it. Honestly, it's scary. I really am going to stop procrastinating so much and try to stay more organized and on top of things and changing out of my comfort zone terrifies me. But my goals are so much bigger than that and I know I can achieve so much if I put my mind and body to it.

For all the students out there, I recommend Study Hacks, a blog about how to do well in school and life after it. He has a lot of great ideas about study techniques and life structure and prioritization that I'm finding really helpful. If anyone has any more tips for doing well, I'd love to hear them :)

I'm going to be going with [ profile] heyiya tomorrow to go see [ profile] lim's Us being shown at the California Museum of Photography. I'm really excited that it's being featured and can't wait to go! Perfect way to start out my time in California.
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The Plan (no, not that one) /SFU reference [Jan. 13th, 2009|07:53 pm]

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[Current Mood |frustrated]
[Current Music |"This World" by Zero 7]

So I've developed a plan for my year to try to get some of my dreams and goals accomplished. I'm really excited about it and have been making daily to do lists in order to keep tabs on what I need to do. I'm using a small notebook to write down all my thoughts and ideas and so far it's proving very helpful.

My first thing is getting the money to go back to Chapman or my backup, Santa Monica College. Who knows how that'll turn out but I've been working on getting financial aid from both. Chapman starts classes on January 26th so hopefully I'll be leaving a few days before then and Santa Monica starts in mid-February but I'll be trying to leave as soon as possible to get out of the cold. I've decided to major in Computer Information Systems while taking some TV classes and doing a lot of TV research and experience on the side so I can get in the industry or some job related to TV after I graduate. I'd major in TV but the major at my school is focused on the creative side of things and as much as I love art, I'm just not an artist in the true sense of the word and don't want to waste my time struggling through scriptwriting classes (not to mention the application). I'm interested in getting some computer and business skills so this major totally works for me (low on essays helps too). So for the rest of my list:

1) Get all A's and B's in my classes. This is the most important thing and goes before everything else. I need to prioritize and not save things til the last minute which can be paralyzing if it's a big task. It's a huge boost to my confidence and self-esteem if I do this so I'm going to keep it at the top of my list. This blog is proving helpful with lots of good tips for any students out there.

2) Be at a healthy weight and stay healthy by playing a sport. I reeeeeeally can't wait to get back to California so I can play tennis outside along with many other sports. Running is alright but I don't like to exercise unless it's fun and sports are lots of fun for me.

3) Meet new people, find new friends and develop some good relationships. I really miss my friends at Chapman (and my cushy job) but I'd really like to branch out and meet more people like I wish I'd done more my freshman year. I especially want to meet some more TV lovers even if they don't go to my school.

4) Make every effort to have a romantic relationship. Cause I really, really want one and I have lots of romantic experiences I'd like to have. Doesn't hurt to try.

5) Finish at least three vids. I'd even limit it to two just as long as I finish my auction vid and a Vividcon one. I just need to get something done this year as my fannish output last year was quite pathetic.

6) Keep up with TV and finish at least The West Wing, The X-Files and The Sopranos.

7) Build, organize and listen to music collection including classic albums and top contemporary ones.

8) Read Wicked (finish), LotR, The Temeraire Series, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy and Watchman.

9) Read Plato, Aristotle, other classics and nonfiction about TV and business.

10) Volunteer for LGBT rights/Obama.

11) Watch vids, keep up on feedback, stay caught up in fandom.

12) Learn Spanish because it's necessary when living in Los Angeles.

That's the plan. Now it's just a matter of going out and doing it.

On another note, once again my computer is having problems (of the unmountable boot volume variety) and I am ready to throw my computer off my desk, Lex style. Or Barney style as the case may be. So I may not be around as much until that gets fixed.
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Even Muggles like yourself should be celebrating, this happy, happy day! [Nov. 9th, 2008|03:36 pm]

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[Current Music |"Affirmation" by Savage Garden]
[Current Mood |optimistic]

That's how I (still) feel about Obama winning. Where Muggles are people who didn't vote for him or people from other countries. It still feels so glorious and wonderful each day waking up to know the Obama (President Obama!) is going to be our next president. It's just this happiness that washes over me each morning and randomly each day. I want to chase this feeling /Toby. Already he's working on making the goverment more democratic and participatory. Check out for more including "requiring his Cabinet officials to have periodic national broadband townhall meetings to discuss issues before their agencies", not signing "any non-emergency bill without giving the American public an opportunity to review and comment on the White House website for five days", "improve the assessments used to track student progress to measure readiness for college and the workplace and improve student learning in a timely, individualized manner. Obama and Biden will also improve NCLB's accountability system so that we are supporting schools that need improvement, rather than punishing them", supporting "the principle of network neutrality" and trying to "pass the Fair Pay Act to ensure that women receive equal pay for equal work and the Employment Non-Discrimination Act to prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity or expression.". SO AMAZING.

Another good thing this election brought me? Rachel Maddow. Even when I was ignoring politics, I couldn't help but watch a few minutes of her show just to see how brilliant, funny and hot she is. I'm going to be involved in politics more now, watching a bit more news, reading more about what's happening, the government and the issues so this LJ may not be as politics free as it used to be but there still should still be a large amount of fandom with vidding and all the shows I watch. I just finally feel like we can bring about real change and I want to be a part of it, to do my part in making this country better.

Now about Prop 8. I'm trying to leave aside my disappointment, sadness and anger and instead channel that into actually doing something about it. On the good side, Prop 8 only applies to future marriages and there are going to be court challenges to it. I can only see that as good because it is not fair at all for the majority to take away the rights of a minority. I'm all for propositions and direct democracy but not in cases like that. Also I hope we can add a proposition to reverse Prop 8. I do think that it is horrible that people are blaming African Americans for passing this as it's everyone who voted yes for the Prop that's caused this to happen. Lashing out like that is wrong and doesn't accomplish anything. The same thing goes for acting like chickens are getting more rights. Um NO. Animal rights has nothing to do with Prop 8 and giving farm animals basic decent treatment is a good thing that should not be bashed.

I am heartened by all the anti-Proposition 8 protests happening in California although I wish I could be there to join them. But now I can and you can too! Join the Impact is organizing a nationwide protest against Prop 8 and the other measures that take away equality and civil rights next Saturday, November 15th, 1:30 - 4:30 (Eastern/10:30 am PT). I urge everyone to check out the website and find the closest location to you for the protest taking place at City Hall or another place as mentioned. I am organizing the Syracuse protest here because I really want to do something against this proposition and I urge anyone who is in a city without a organizer or that's not represented to try to help start one. So that's what I'm going to be working on this week.

In vidding news, [ profile] laurashapiro put together a vidding documentary for MIT to show to middle and high schoolers. It's here and there's a bunch of vidders there talking about vidding. I'm in it as well, the second person with the LA shirt in the What is vidding? video. I saw it at Vividcon and I was so happy to see how it turned out. Everyone should go check it out and see how awesome it is! Also if you're looking for AMAZING vid meta, check out [ profile] tishaturk for some wonderfully interesting thoughts about vidding and narrative, two of my very favorite things.

I hate the new LJ profile page. Why do they change the things that aren't broken?! At the very least they should give us an option to opt out of it. Argh.

Other good things: new Sex and the City movie next summer! Let's hope they don't give a BS reason for splitting Carrie/Big up this time and give us lots of time with all four of the gang. Also can't wait to see Quantum of Solace, mostly for the Daniel Craig hotness. Speaking of movies, I got four movies including Harry Potter 5, American Gangster and Sex and the City for only $20 dollars the other day. And I'm starting on getting one of my friends to watch The Wire and she likes it so far so I'm really happy about that. Still working on catching up on shows, did Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, Entourage and working on Friday Night Lights which is amazing as usual. Hopefully I'll have some thoughts about them in a later post.
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Marriage is love. [Nov. 5th, 2008|11:07 am]

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[Current Music |"Epic" by Faith No More]
[Current Mood |depressed]

I don't even know what to say. I was slowly accepting that Prop 8 passed last night and then waking up to it this morning was even more shocking and depressing. For the first time I feel ashamed to be a Californian. At the same time I feel proud to be American and that really, really sucks. It hit me in the car this morning on the way to class and I couldn't stop crying. How can this happen? What is wrong with people? I just don't get it and I doubt I ever will. How can anyone ever understand hate, discrimination and inequality? To take those civil rights away from people is just wrong. I cannot believe people cannot separate religion and government when separation between church and state is so important to this country from the very beginning. And makes me feel even more negative to the destructive part of (some) religions. And the worst part is so many of the same people who voted for Obama voted for this proposition and I find that so hard to believe.

I wish I could have done more. I wish I could have voted, been in California and campaigned and done everything possible to stop this disgusting proposition. It's my own fault though and that frustrates me so much. I want my state to be a beautiful, amazing, equal place to live for everyone and this is such a big stop to this. I can't believe that I trusted this state so much to do the right thing and they didn't. I feel so let down by both them and me.

Randomly bursting into tears because Obama won or because Prop 8 passed? Not fun. I want off this roller coaster right about now. Trying to cope by watching some Queer as Folk vids with plenty of love, kissing, romance and sex and although I don't want Brian and Justin to get married, I want them to have that right. I'm never one to put marriage as the biggest end goal, I NEVER say, I want to get married but I want to find true love/a long term romantic partner/etc but I want everyone that wants to get married, between two consenting adults, to have that chance. At least now that Barack Obama is president I don't have to fear constitutional bans so much and hopefully he'll help inspire people to change their minds.

So what do we do now? I'm not up to speed on California proposition rules (although I really need to catch up) but how do we overturn/repeal/etc Proposition 8? Cause no matter how much I feel beaten down, tired and like I want to give up right now, I know we have to keep fighting til the end of days. And I have to keep remembering that just like we ended slavery and gave black men (and eventually women) the right to vote, ended discrimination in the 60's and now have an African American president, our country will go in the direction of equality, oppurtunity and life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for all. Which includes gay marriage. We'll get there no matter how much time it takes.

This is also not helped by the fact that even TV is being disrupted by this bigotness. ABC Fires Brooke Smith who basically is in a lesbian relationship on Grey's Anatomy while also changing a future bisexual character straight. I am disgusted and sickened by ABC after admiring them so much for being so gay friendly. Ugh, it just pissed me off so much.

And hopefully, I'll be back to my regularly scheduled fannish activities starting now. It's good to know that I can trust fandom to be decidingly No on Prop 8!
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I can drink! [Oct. 11th, 2008|01:30 pm]

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[Current Music |"Safe Enough to Wake Up" by The Ben Taylor Band]
[Current Mood |happy]

It's my 21st birthday today so now I can legally drink and go into clubs and bars. Yay! The latter part is most important but it's the freedom thing that's good too. Thanks muchly to [ profile] talitha78 and [ profile] clayangel for the virtual presents, they make me very, very happy :D

So far it's been a great day. I led up into my birthday last night watching Failure to Communicate (Doris! total coincidence, next on the list) and Need to Know and then right at 12 am watched Synergy (It Had To Be You) (and then two more times) which made me drunk with House/Wilson love. Watched Once More With Feeling in the morning, had a scrumpious breakfast at iHoP and am about to be off to try to get my House/Wilson TV Guide for my birthday. And then I have a birthday party with friends and a dinner where I'll order my first drink. Can't wait! There should be plenty of Office watching, of course.

Been kind of crazy year with lots of transitions but hopefully I'll get my life going in the right direction and will be back in California next year. And there's been a lot of great memories too in the last year.

I find it funny that when I was born there was a financial crisis going on and now here we are today but oh well. In more important news though (at least to me), it's National Coming Out Day and in California, Proposition 8 is on the ballot trying to take away gay marriage. From [ profile] melina123,

There are powerful interests pouring millions of dollars to support this proposition, and there are recent polls showing we're losing. So if you can, please give some money. The minimum credit card donation is $5. If you can give that, or $10 or $20, please, please do. Or sign up to phonebank. You don't have to live in California to help.

Seriously. If we lose, we're pretty much done with this issue in California for a very long time to come -- this is a constitutional amendment and it will be very, very hard to change if it's passed. If we fail at this in California, it will only be more difficult in other states.

Think of Kevin and Scotty! Or any GLBT or slash pairing you support or you know, your friends and the people who would have their rights taken away by this proposition. This is so important and the best birthday gift I could get is if people would help support them and this proposition would get defeated.

Sorry to be negative on my birthday but it had to be said. Now back to my party! \o/
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Wilson is sad and so am I. [Sep. 30th, 2008|11:59 pm]

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[Current Mood |blah]
[Current Music |tv in the background]

I'm feeling so bummed tonight.

Ruminations about my life and college )

Didn't like House tonight. One guess why. Promo > Episode. The thing that disappoints me about House is it's never going to be the show I want it to be. I hate the episodic procedural plots sooooooo much and the ducklings are all boring and I don't like them besides Kutner who is very cute. If it was up to me, it'd just be the issues and craziness of House, Wilson and Cuddy's life with minimal medicine stuff when relevant. Also House and Wilson would be together and kissing a lot but hey. And as much as House is my favorite and I always enjoy his hilarity, Wilson is just pure love. I am kind of in love with his voice. And RSL was oh so cute in that interview with Lisa. Saw a little bit of Clueless and Safe the other day and OMG I love House/Wilson and miss them so much. Also saw Failure to Communicate tonight and awww I love House/Stacy too. They're totally doomed but it makes it easier to ship as I can just adore their cuteness and that beautiful hotel scene. I can't help loving the shared history type couples with that past you can never go back to but that connection remains so you can't help but be drawn together.

Back in July in Montreal, I had this wonderful dream where House and Wilson were sitting against a wall (ever notice that Wilson always sits to the right of House/left to our eyes?) and Wilson was all unsure of their relationship and vulnerable and such (post S4) and House leans over and kisses him to try to reassure him with the words he can't say. It was perfect. I blame it for making me desperate to see them kiss. But I was thinking whether it'd ever be possible for me to recreate that dream with vidding. Like in the future can we get actors to be in different positions when they kiss or however you'd do it. Sounds impossible but who knows? And then I had this dream recently with House kissing Wilson on the cheek and it was all so sweet.

I'm dropping Fringe which completely bores me and True Blood where I don't like the characters and relationships because I can't get myself to care to watch them. Maybe I'll catch up with reruns later. I am watching Greek which is enjoyable especially with the great gay storyline and Freaks and Geeks which is not my kind of humor (Judd and me don't mix) but I love Lindsey and James Franco and Jason Segall are incredibly hot, plus cute geeks so I'm enjoying it. In the last week, one person on my list was converted to The Wire and another to Firefly so I'm very happy there :) I kind of want to change my mood theme to an Irina one but it's been so long having this one that I'm not sure I want to change, I just miss seeing it on my Flist. I probably will change back but maybe I will when I have the time to mess with it.

Still have no money, probably won't get hard drive for another month. I have way too many wants for the amount of money I'm making which is one big reason for college then why am I having such problems motivating myself to do well in it? Argh. And I reaaaally miss LA. First it's getting cold here and I hate it more than words can say and then I miss out on Office writers, Arrested Development events and cons in general. Wish I could go to Dallas too so I could see Doris Egan do an informal commentary on House vs. God, still my favorite episode. On the bright side, I now possess the Pushing Daisies DVDs and they are so pretty. Pie-lette is just as perfect as I remembered. I am forever charmed by that show. On my list of favorite all-time shows, PD wins over fifth place which hopefully will continue into TOMORROW, yay!


[ profile] bop_radar's First Vidding Chat talking about vid planning. Feel free to share your thoughts! More background on it here and poll and more discussion here.

The Organization of Transformative Works has released the new fan wiki, Fanlore! Everyone is encouraged to write their own fan history and edit the history of the fandoms they're in.

New community, [ profile] queer_as_tv! Basically a community about GLBT representation on television. As I'll watch almost any show that features a gay storyline (case in point, Greek), it's perfect for me.

I love looking at TV ratings cause I love TV too much but if you're interested in how your shows are doing, check out TV By The Numbers. The best thing is the Renew/Cancel Index which predicts which shows will be cancelled or might be by looking at their 18-49 demographic ratings which need to be at 92% of the network's average to have a good chance at surviving. So far Til Death, Old Christine, Lipstick Jungle, Knight Rider, T:TSCC (why is this show not doing better numbers :(), Gary Unmarried, My Name is Earl, Privelled, Prison Break, The Unit, Cold Case and Ugly Betty (noooo) are in danger in order of severity. Thankfully The Office, House, Heroes, Grey's, HIMYM, Gossip Girl, Brothers & Sisters and Supernatural all seem pretty safe. I find it all so fascinating.
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Bulletpoint notes for today [Jul. 27th, 2008|01:48 pm]

[Tags|, , , ]
[Current Mood |pleased]
[Current Music |"A Beautiful Mine" by Aceyalone and RJD2]

Quick Things:

-Mad Men premiere tonight!!! 10 pm, don't forget. I'm sooo excited. I love this show and it grew on me and grew on me and now I'm actually rewatching S1 which I barely ever do so soon. It's the greatest before bedtime show when you need something slow that will make you pay close attention to everything.

-Going to see The Dark Knight (HEATH) and Wall-E tonight in a movie double feature with [ profile] lianri. Should be fun and hopefully I will like both. I watched Batman Begins and I have to say that I didn't really like it as although the darkness was nice, it was kind of lame especially in the dialogue and I HATED the "romance". So, so glad they're replacing Katie Holmes. I don't find Christian Bale very attractive either although he looked okay in this movie.

-Down two pant sizes! It's awesome. I have decided I'm going to run the LA marathon next March so I am working on running to train for that.

-I reeeeeeeally miss California. Like, reading about it or gazing longingly at live cams of it makes me cry kind of miss. Again, not the weather just the palm trees (not that either, Burn Notice doesn't do much for me), the entertainment capitol, the atmosphere, the streets, the beaches, everything is perfect to me. It's my home and I should not be away from it! I'll be back in January/February.

-I'm catching up on Psych (in S2) now and it's so much fun. First season I was enjoying the Shawn/Gus slash but late in S1, it switched over to Shawn/Lassiter and now I loove them. I have a little crush on Lassie and I just love the prickly love/hate thing they have going on. Should be done with it by the next new episode.

I love summer TV if I haven't mentioned that already. Project Runway, Burn Notice, Stargate Atlantis, Flashpoint, Mad Men, Psych, it's allll good.
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Made in LA ie Lots of Little Things Part 2 [Jun. 12th, 2008|12:26 am]

[Tags|, , , , , , , , , , ]
[Current Music |"Not With You" by Tegan and Sara]
[Current Mood |accomplished]

I reeeeally miss LA. Just saying if it's not obvious. It's been annoyingly humid here and although I prefer it over cold, nothing beats the dry heat of LA. So much better to be hot there and with the dry heat, it feels good and totally bearable even in the 90's. At least for me. I did go swimming the other day which I haven't done since...last January maybe? In LA of course. I did unexpectedly meet some friends there which was nice.

Also going to Montreal with [ profile] clayangel in July to see some Ryan and Greg shows and I can't wait! Never been there before so it'll be good to expand my Canadian horizons.

Okay, now TV. Kind of behind on TV watching with two episodes of Doctor Who to watch and one BSG but both shows are kind of meh to me now so ehh whatever. Hopefully will do them tomorrow though. Not much of a Stephen Moffet lover as it always seems like there is too much random other characters and not enough character love of the ones I do love not to mention plots that I'm not very interested in (The Doctor Dances two parter was okay, plus JACK). So I'm not really that happy about the news he's running the show after RTD but I'm always willing to give him a chance so we'll see what happens. I still have lots of shows to catch up on from Farscape and The X-Files (the odds of finishing before VVC are now way down) to Prison Break and Smallville to Psych, Burn Notice and Mad Men. So little time, so much TV...

John Barrowman pictures of hotness. I am so, so disappointed that there's only going to be 5 episodes of Torchwood next year. I need my Jack fix! Plus, I need Jack and Ianto boykissing...*pouts*

Speaking of, does anyone know the best place to watch the gay parts of that German soap opera? I must see it! I checked out Luke and Noah and they were very cute but the soap opera stuff was too much for me at the time...I may see all of it later though. I am interested in Forbidden Love though.

BEST COMMERCIAL EVER: I just...god, it made me cry. As a huge flying fan, it made me want to fly again so badly and I strongly believe someday I will even if it's not the real thing. It's so cute and very, very touching.

If you've ever wanted to save a link for a later or save a post til say after you've seen a show or movie and do it quickly, try the Read It Later add on for Firefox (if you're still using should switch). All you have to do is right click a link or press a button you can add onto the top of your browser and you have it saved for later reading. It's helped me a lot with not forgetting certain posts and links when I don't have the time to read them or comment. I'm still kind of lazy sometimes and am gradually getting better at it.

I have a ticket to the tennis US Open finals! *squee* It'll be my first time going or ever seeing a match live so I really can't wait. Plus I am pretty sure that Federer is going to make it to the finals and tie Pete Sampras's record so I want to see history in the making. I would totally stalk him as I reeeally want to meet him but I'm just going to go for a day to save money so it's not worth the effort. I'm sure I'll meet him someday. The loss at the French Open broke my heart, I was really invested this time and it's always devastating when he can't quite pull it off. Oh underdogs, you kill me.

So I started watching The Biggest Loser on a whim a few days ago...and somehow developed a serious crush on the trainer, Jillian Michaels. I definitely have a type for tough, awesome, ass kicking woman especially dark haired women. The thing is while I think a lot of women are very pretty, I'm usually not very attracted except for a few and personality plays a big part in that. The short list (besides Jillian) is Lena Olin, Alexandra Hedison, Kate Moennig, Karina Lombard and Lena Headey (Katee/Starbuck in the miniseries is very close). But sometimes the stars align and they definitely do in this case. My love for her has grown exponentially while watching Season 5 (how much do I hate the game? FUCK THE GAME) and she pulls off the HARDCORE, yelling (and I love that she swears so great) trainer like no other and I loooove it and eat it up. She's got me so invested in her winning that I cheer ecstatically at the victories and cry at the losses (oh god one scene in S5 was SO heartbreaking it HURT...oh the woobieness). I love a good Jillian beating and nothing beats Jillian HUGS (they make me so happy!). She's so inspiring to me and a great role model which works for me so much as having people to look up to motivates me a lot. Team Jillian for LIFE. (Trainer love! ie where Jillian and Bob are cuteness)

Plus I love that she loves martial arts as one of my dreams is to be able to kick ass like all my girl heroes (and guys too) that I love from both my Sydneys (first Walker Texas Ranger, then Alias) to Buffy and all the other great warrior women (Zoe love!). I will definitely be making that happen at some point. If there's one thing I love about this season it was the awesome display of GIRL POWER. Just so amazing to be the underdogs and yet pull off some awesome, awesome wins. Because women CAN do anything and accomplish their dreams and do the impossible. Fucking A.

Also in one episode there was TIM GUNN. I literally screamed in the middle of the night, I was so excited. Talk about dream crossovers actually happening. There has not been enough Tim Gunn in my life lately. And I hope this puts the zaftig debacle to bed (TWSS...sorry force of habit). Also, July 16th is the Project Runway premiere, yay! Still the best reality show ever.

Picture of Jillian under the cut in the shirt I want SO MUCH IT HURTS (see subject line)  )

Never done this meme so I'm trying it: You give me three names in a fandom I know, I tell you whom I'd toss off a cliff, whom I'd shag, and whom I'd marry. Then (if you like) I give you three names, and so it goes.
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Update Pt. 1 [Feb. 21st, 2008|09:43 am]

[Tags|, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ]
[Current Mood |productive]
[Current Music |"Angel With An Attitude" by The Ditty Bops]

I have a lot of stuff to catch up on so bear with me.

So I have made it back to Syracuse, NY but not before the Travel Curse struck again! I had my first late night flight a week and a half ago and it was awesome to have Dan in Real Life being the movie they played for us. I had a one stop flight so I landed in Philly where I had to go from the D gate to the F gate. I carry my heavy laptop bag and backpack and walk to get to the F gate when I see a metaphoric fork in the road so to speak saying one way to the ABCD gates and another sign to E and F and another with a warning about how if you go this way you have to rescreen. They mention a shuttle but I don't see a sign for it so I go towards the E and F gate. When I see a security guard I ask him where I can catch the shuttle to the F gate. Surprise! I missed it and I was told I couldn't go back and had to keep walking. And of course I had to rescreen at 7 am EST with a huge line and 50 minutes til my flight left it. I kept getting closer and closer and hoping I'd make it, pissed off because I never wanted to be in a situation where I would miss my flight (I always try to get there 2 hours early) and of course with 10 minutes to my flight leaves I get through airport security where they take five minutes taking out ALL my hard drives and cords and putting them through the baggage checker even when I told them I needed to hurry. And of course my gate was the farthest away so even though I ran I missed my flight. Thankfully another one left in two hours so it wasn't too bad a wait but then when I get back to Syracuse they lose my check in luggage. The good news is they returned it a day later but it was still extra frustration.

I'm back now and although it's cold, I'm all layered up and at the moment it's not too bad so I don't even need my winter coat :) I can deal with it for a few months. I am SO happy to see my cats again, I missed them so much and now I have many hugs and cuddle sessions to catch up on. Am currently looking for a job which I should hopefully get soon as I need some money. The bad news is TWO of my hard drives have stopped working, the ones with all my DVDs (thankfully I have some on my last remaining hard drive for my current vid projects), music (I have some on my laptop so I'm not totally screwed there) and TV shows. But I do have fast internet back so it doesn't take very long to download stuff. I had forgotten how nice it is to download an episode in 10 minutes or so :D I'm disappointed that a short trip to NYC I was going to do today didn't happen but thankfully NYC is only 5 hours or so away and hopefully I can visit soon! I really want to see Bryant Park and hopefully Tim Gunn if I can plan a trip right. I just miss the city even if LA will always own my heart.

I spent my time after my trip catching up on some shows, marathoning Lost and reorganizing my vid files and a few other things. Up til now, My Videos has been organized by having many folders named by fandom and I'd put a vid I downloaded into the fandom folder it belonged too. But to make it easier to open up a lot of vids all at once, I decided to rename ALL my vid files by adding the fandom to the beginning of the video even if it was just "Anime", "Movies" or "Multifandom". I also made a New Vids folder for the vids I download that I'm too lazy to rename and to make it easier to watch new vids I download. It took awhile and I had to reconstruct my vids playlist but it's been worth it has everything is much more organized and easier to get at and with my 40+ GB of vids, I need that. How does everyone else organize their vids? In order to catch up with my Flist I also made some filters to put every single member of my Flist on a smaller reading list to make it less overwhelming to reply to posts. So far that's worked pretty well although hopefully I won't need to use it too much.

The Writer's strike is over! YAY :D I find it wonderfully coincidental that I leave for CA when the strike began and left right when it ended. I am so happy to at least get a salvaged season with some news episodes of some of my favorite shows. Namely The Office in which we get 6 more episodes and possibly an hour finale! I'm am just SO EXCITED to see the next episode on April 10th which is supposed to be amazing and funny and intense and unique. So I'm really looking forward to that. Not so excited about them skipping ahead in time because I like to see how things progress and for vidding purposes. The good news is almost all my shows are renewed and I'm hoping desperately that Friday Night Lights will be renewed. I cannot wait til April! Should be awesome to have new TV on almost every night.

In hopefully what will be the last time I talk politics before November, a quick word. I am for (and will vote for) whatever Democrat wins the primary. I'd be okay with either of them although I prefer Obama but as long as Bush is gone and there is not another Republican in the White House then I'm happy. Should be fun to live with a super conservative and Ron Paul supporter politics people until November though (NOT). I will find refuge in my politics free zone or mostly liberal Flist happy place though.

Okay, meme time! 5 question and 5 OTP memes )

[written yesterday] Yay Project Runway tonight! I love Wednesday's because it's the start of new episodes with PR and Torchwood. And tonight is a reunion episode and I LOVE reunion episodes. The video montages are always awesome and there is lots more Tim Gunn and it's fun seeing all the contestants again. I don't think they can ever beat the S2 one though but here's hoping. I'm SURE we're going to see a Ricky crying video and a Christian one with all the time he says fierce or similar funny statements. And this time I can actually watch it live and not have to wait five days for the torrent!

Spoilers up to the latest Project Runway episode (not the reunion) )

Spoilers for Stargate Atlantis up to Midway )

Contrary to most of my Flist, I'm just not feeling the Supernatural love these days. I don't know if it's overexposure or S3 in general but I just can't get emotional about the boys and show anymore :( I cried at the S2 finale and now just nothing. And I'm not really intellectually interested anymore. I have really liked the last few episodes and Dean and Sam have been really cute so at least there's that. I'm glad everyone else is loving and investing in the show though.

So I'm watching Eli Stone primary for Victor Garber and thankfully it is pretty funny enough to keep me entertained. The biggest GLEE moment is definitely getting to see Victor sing. Here's a youtube clip of it. I love his voice. It's such a disconnect seeing him so NOT!Jack Bristow but his line at the scene reminds me strongly of him so at least there's that. But he SMILES! I will never get enough of that; it makes me smile in turn. The other thing about the show I love is Tom Amandes is in it! I loved him in Everwood and just seeing him onscreen makes me happy.

Spoilers for Eli Stone up to 103 )

In more Victor Garber singing clips of LOVE, here's him singing and then singing and dancing in Anne with my favorite song from the musical. I pretty much die with glee everytime I see it. He's SO CUTE! It is a little too much for me to handle. Oh and him being gay only makes me love him even more. I sure do know how to pick them :)

Next post: DIY, more TV and Jack/Irina gushing (OMG I LOVE THEM SO MUCH).
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When I say Union, you say Power...UNION POWER! (Also tonight's Office and pictures!) [Nov. 8th, 2007|11:41 pm]

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[Current Mood |restless]
[Current Music |the office]

I LOVED tonight's Office! STEVE CARELL wrote it!!! I was so surprised that I gasped and then squeed. Steve is a genius and he just *gets* the characters. Hilarious and brilliant and I love Michael too much to exist and there is a Jim growth arc beginning YAY and OMG I love this show times a billion. Which is why I almost started crying two times when I realized this would be the second to last time I would experience a new episode of The Office on Thursday. I will not be watching anything at 9 on Thursdays in solidarity. THIS is why Steve Carell did not show up for work on Monday and Tuesday. Because he IS a writer and a damn good one.

So today I visited Universal, NBC Burbank, Walt Disney and Warner Brothers. Lots of strikers out there and LOTS of honking. There wasn't more than 20 seconds between honks most of the time and a lot of the time it was continuous. I gave my support to all of them I met. At NBC Burbank I talked to a writer from Bones and one from Eureka and they told me that The Office writers and cast are at Universal at Barham St. So that's where I will be next week ;) No, I'll probably be at other places but I do hope to picket with The Office writers sometime if I can. At Walt Disney, a striker invited me to join in so I took a sign and got to it! It was lots of fun and great to feel a part of it. The funniest part was the guy singing the WGA strike protest song sung to YMCA. Sooo awesome. Lots of honking and I got to talk to the writers a lot more. I told them about all the fans supporting them, about the website and LJ and they were happy to hear it and invited all the fans to come join them.

Also, a website supporting Office writers and organizing efforts to support them: Office Fans For Office Writers. Go help!

Oh and finally: PICTURES! All under the cut. I have Colin and Brad from last April, older California pictures, pictures of me and The Office cast from the convention, the real Dunder-Mifflin and strikers and studios. Enjoy:

Pictures under the cut )

Oh and because Jenna Fischer is awesome: I LOVE FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS! I'm not sure I can say it enough. And boy...Riggins. Riggins! The tortured soul! The bedroom eyes! Jesus! Let's end the strike for Riggins!" Word. Also, for The Office because I need some new episodes desperately.

Tomorrow's Fox picketing should be HUGE! I'll be there supporting everyone!
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Brief Update [Nov. 6th, 2007|09:26 pm]

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[Current Mood |optimistic]

I'm in California! OMGYAY!!! I am so unbelievably happy to be here. I hugged the first palm tree I saw just like I said I would :) And it's warm here! And I saw the mountains (including the Colorado ones) and will see the ocean tomorrow (Santa Monica for the first time!) and saw the Bank of America building from Angel and wow is my city ever big. But I love it all.

My travel curse continued as the car almost swerved off the highway, a tire blew off and we had to call Triple A which made me miss my flight. But I was alright and I got more tickets for free and I was only three hours late. Carrying around all my stuff on buses and walking was hell but I got here alright and so far the rooming situation seems awesome. I'm farther away from downtown as I would like but it's cheap and I can take buses and stuff into the city. I'm just glad I made it and everytime I looked out and smiled seeing California made it worth it. I have been up now since 2 AM and since it's technically 12:30 AM on the East Coast, I am exhausted.

I am SO excited for tomorrow though. I am visiting Hollywood and Highlands again, going to see Santa Monica and possibly going to see where The Office is shot! I want to see if they're striking and if they are, support them. Plus seeing The Office cast/crew again would be awesome ;)

On an Office note, I am so sad that out of all the shows that I could live without because of the strike, the ONE show that I can't is the one show that has stopped production. I totally support Steve, Greg, Mindy, BJ, Paul, Rainn, etc for striking but it does suck. I just wish they would get their money already so I could get more Office.
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I'm going to California! [Nov. 5th, 2007|05:26 pm]

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[Current Music |"California" by Wave]
[Current Mood |excited]

So tomorrow morning, I am flying to California to live. I can't believe it's finally here and I get to go back home tomorrow :) I have a place and will be looking for a job while I'm there. I am really looking forward to it and to seeing all my favorite places and visiting new ones. Plus I'm leaving 40s weather for 70s. Mmmm sunshine and warmth. I've missed it so much.

In honor of this event, my list of my top ten memories of my last year in California:

California Top Ten )

All in all, it was an absolutely amazing year in the place I love the most. I can't believe I'm going back again! Hopefully it'll be filled with even more great new memories. I'm kind of scared striking out on my own but I really want the independence that comes with it so I'm mostly just excited.

California, YAY!
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Everything that is awesome [Oct. 5th, 2007|01:51 am]

[Tags|, , , , , , , ]
[Current Mood |jubilant]
[Current Music |the office]

A meme that perfectly fits my mood today:

Rules are easy, just post 10 things that recently made you happy! Tag 10 people and force them to post this meme on their LJs. Do it if you have happy things to say!

1. THE OFFICE. MY SHOW!! It's back every week and it's still making me ridiculously happy and gleeful and I love ALL the characters and it's definitely my favorite show by infinity. Tonight's episode was hilarious and I loved it even more than last week with my FAMILY and the continuity and the relationships and KELLY *hearts* Can it always be Office day please?
2. There might be a Serenity movie!!! Apparently from Alan Tudyk, “They had to put [the new DVD] out because they’ve been selling out of the other one and so Universal’s like ‘So, let’s do another one’. And now… there’s now a chance there’s going to be another movie". OMG SQUEE! I mean, it's not for sure but that still makes me insanely happy that there's a chance. I'm getting the Collector's set for my birthday but I want to encourage everyone who loves Firefly/Serenity to buy it!
3. Pushing Daisies did well in the ratings! Everyone was so worried about them and now it won the time period :D I had faith because it is the only drama in the time period and seriously, the pilot is so beautiful and charming and brilliant, how could people not want to check it out? That being said, I was nervous all day and was very happy to hear it did well. Now the scary part is whether it loses any viewers next week.
4. Justin from Ugly Betty FILLS ME WITH CUTENESS! He is so adorable. And him and Marc are so awesome and make me so gleeful. And Wilhelmina is back to her awesome self. The whole show was hilarious tonight.
5. My boys from Supernatural are back! Still blah about the plot but there relationship is so cute and I adore Dean and the emo pain.
6. Grey's Anatomy is fun again! It's actually funny and there is the awesomeness of Cristina and slash that makes me happy (four instances for my favorite pairings!) and Bailey being super amazing and Meredith not being totally horrible. I prefer to ignore the bad things.
7. The Office did well in ratings on Thursday! It went up against heavy competition, yay! My show is awesome.
8. My birthday next week with a new Office episode!!! BEST present ever.
9. Mr. Bennett and Claire on Heroes continue to make me very gleeful each week. Also M cubed *hearts them*
10. Going to California in one month and a week!!!! Finally I get to go home to where I belong. With the warm weather and palm trees and entertainment capital of the world and the ocean and everything pretty much.

I need sleep. But I am happy to see my Flist full of TV squee. I have been fighting my anti-writing/procrastination nature lately and lack of sleep does not help.
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RL update [Sep. 9th, 2007|10:34 pm]

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[Current Mood |sleepy]
[Current Music |"Pavlov's Bell" by Aimee Mann]

Since it's been a bit unclear lately, a brief RL update. I am currently in Syracuse, NY instead of my beloved California. This makes me very sad. But there are reasons and benefits to it. I'm on a leave of absence from college because I am suffering a burnout from schoolwork and need a break from it all. Plus I have no idea what I want to do with my life and so my motivation is very low. I'm currently working and saving up money to go back to California (LA) after Christmas/January because I can't stand another winter here AND I want to go to Melora's shows, DIY and Escapade. In college I was always dying to live out on my own so doing that for at least eight months or so will hopefully give me the independent living and time off I need to go back college in the fall (or longer depending on how it goes). In that time, I really want to look into career options some more as Psychology and me didn't really work out. I think my problem is I have a lot of interests and my skillset is not one that's easily defined into anything so it's hard to find something that really fits me. It's like in fandom, I'm very multi-fannish and I get obsessed with things for short times but I can never really stick with one thing. Except for vidding and that's only a hobby for me.

On the plus side for being in NY, it leaves me closer to my friend [ profile] lianri to watch Heroes and The Office when they premiere, close to New Jersey so I can visit [ profile] indybaggins, [ profile] clayangel and [ profile] blackstray in October and drive to Scranton for the Office convention in late October. And seeing as that month also holds my birthday (which is perfect for getting early/same day birthday presents of TV DVD sets), it should be an awesome month. Besides that fact that I won't be in California which I miss SO MUCH OMG. When I go back, I'm going to hug the first palm tree I see, I swear. And appreciate every single day in MY STATE and my city and in the warm California sun. Everyone commented last year how happy California made me and how much I appreciated it and so no matter the bad that happened last year, I still regard it as one of the best years of my life.

I suck at comments lately as what always happens but know that I'm reading everything and am so thankful to have such an awesome Flist. Nothing like coming home each day and getting in a good mood reading LJ :)
Link18 comments|Leave a comment Check it out. [Jul. 4th, 2007|04:01 pm]

[Tags|, ]
[Current Music |vids]
[Current Mood |nostalgic]

So I finally stopped being lazy and actually made a website for people to view. Defying Gravity for your viewing pleasure. It has all my vids on it and hopefully vid and fanfic recs to come. Let me know if anything doesn't work or any suggestions.

I'm missing California SO much these days. Here's some reasons why I love it and a couple things I'm not fond of:

What do you love about L.A?
Everything. Well no but it often feels like it. I love the weather first of all, I no longer have to worry about cold and the sun shines brightly in my face each day to make me a little happier. I love the ocean, the mountains, the deserts, the big city life and the palm trees all in close reach. I love that there are so many things to do and always a big name somewhere to check out. I love the diversity of people, places and the love of entertainment. I love the amusement parks, the Hollywood sign and the beautiful architecture. I love the feeling of trying to make it in a city where everyone has big dreams and believes in them.

What do you hate about L.A?
The high cost (but that's the price of paradise). The lack of public transportation at certain times and into other places. The traffic when it's slow. But all worth it in the end.

I love my city. I love my state.

The good news is since my brother is going to be buying his own car next year, I get the old one. So I'm already planning a road trip cross country from NY to California. Should be fun and heaven to have my own car in LA.

Happy 4th of July!
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While today it is me, we all shall fall [May. 31st, 2007|02:34 am]

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[Current Music |vids]
[Current Mood |indescribable]

So I'm back in NY with my family after my first year of college. I miss California a LOT. It's not just the weather as it's been beautiful here but that sense of freedom and adventure and newness. Not to mention there being nothing to do here reminding me how much I hate it. Sick of my family in a week as was to be expected. But I LOVE my cats and that helps. Also I got my laptop back to working :D I hadn't realized how much I missed it until I had that freedom of my own computer and being able to save everything, download and go on it as much as I want. I've been really bad with commenting lately and I apologize. I'll try to get better at that.

In regards to fandom, well I'll hopefully have a roundup of all the finales up soon. More importantly, I'm sure most of you have already heard all about the Livejournal Strikethrough 2007 debacle that's going on but if you haven't, check out the link here that'll give you a good summary and lots of links. In short, a group called Warriors For Innocence (and possibly others), in their quest to stop pedophiles and other evils threaten Six Apart/Livejournal to shut down journals which list things like incest, rape and whatnot in their interests and not only take down a few communities that needed to be taken down but suspend communities and users based on fictional interest, rpg characters and a Spanish community dicussing Lolita. WTH LJ. Of course it was for legal pressures and all about money as usual but the lack of discretion or warning for the difference between fictional and real is disturbing. No matter your involvement in fandom, remember this: Even more scary are PR comments made not to LJ's customers but the media:

"Our decision here was not based on pure legal issues," countered Six Apart's Berkowitz. "It was based on what community we want to build and what we think is appropriate within that community and what's not. We have an awful broad range of discussions and topics and other things going on in LiveJournal, and we encourage other broad-ranging conversations on all sorts of topics. This was a specific case where we felt there was not a reason (for these journals to stay online)."

When someone starts trying to decide what is appropriate, I know there's a problem. It may not be a freedom of speech issue in terms of the law but I always thought of Livejournal as a place to freely express my thoughts and stories with many people who would do the same and this violates my trust in the site and service I paid for. That's part of where the moral outrage is coming from, I think, at least for me. I hope this blows over and LJ apologizes and makes amends by unsuspending fandom accounts not to mention real life support groups and the like although I'm not too hopeful at the moment. It feels to me that this is quickly turning into a Heroes plot with fandom being the exploding man if 6Apart/LJ doesn't do something to diffuse the situation. In the meantime, take off anything illegal from your interests (and no wincest is not illegal as the very definition is about two fictional characters), backup your journals with LJarchive or a similar serive, join [ profile] fandom_counts to be counted a member of fandom (I've always wanted to see how many people were in fandom) and create a backup journal at GreatestJournal or a similar LJ like site. I'm anoel43 at GreatestJournal as anoel got taken before I could snatch it up (still anoel on Vox though). I hope there isn't a migration but I'm not exactly trusting LJ anymore.

In the end, fandom will survive. We will continue creating fanfic, fanart, fanvids, meta, episode reactions and lots of squee. We're do gen, het, slash, incest, chan, underage and every other boundary breaking thing no matter what the world tries to do. You can't stop the signal.

After all that, go check out the Picspam of Hotties that includes many, many pages of many of our favorite characters and actors being as hot as they possibly can. It definitely cheers me up. Here's my selection under the cut (warning for big pics):

Mmmm goodness )

And with that I will go back to marathoning Scrubs S5 as I am completely, head over heels in love with the show.
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Beach Games [May. 17th, 2007|04:05 pm]

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[Current Mood |anxious]
[Current Music |The Office]

Happy Birthday [ profile] paddies and [ profile] claireweasley! Claire, thank you so much for all your wonderful fic, great picspams and most of all, you're great personality. I hope you have a great year!

Happy Belated Birthday to [ profile] jarrow272 and [ profile] hafital!

Let it be known that at this moment, I am INSANELY jealous at all you East Coast people watching The Office finale right now. In the meantime, here's my episode thoughts on Beach Games.

The Office: Beach Games spoilers )

In other news, I have gotten hooked onto Scrubs. It's so good! I needed a new comedy to watch and no laugh track + high quality + funny and charming= a great show for me to watch. I'm on S2 right now. I love all the characters not to mention the funny fantasy sequences. But my definite favorite part is Dr. Cox. He's like House! I definitely have a type. He's so funny though and handles JD so well with his hilarious speeches. And yet he really does care about his patients and even makes heroic moves for them sometimes. I have completely fallen for him. I'm not much for shipping for this show but I'm especially open to any Dr. Cox ships, at the moment Cox/JD, Cox/Jordan and even a little Cox/Carla. I do love JD with all his funny fantasies and because he's such a dork and it's too cute. And lines like this: "Sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it" are not only incredibly slashy but adorable. JD/Turk's best friendship is so enjoyable to watch. I really like Eliot too with all her insecurities and funny inappropiate comments and Carla is great too. And Jordan is too funny and awesome at throwing down comebacks. The end of the last episode of S1 KILLED me in its awesomeness. The only thing I'm not so much of a fan of is the Turk/Carla relationship which bores me. Oh well. I'm on His Story now which was wonderful in diverting from the standard JD POV. Looking forward to watching more!

Onto the Upfronts. I'm happy that The Office got more episodes but after all the talk of more episodes, it was a little disappointing. I just don't want to deal with any more horrible hiatuses. The move to 9:00 scares me even though I know being the highest/second highest show on Thursday, it makes sense. And I do know that NBC loves the show so its not going to cancel it if the ratings go down. But it makes it harder to get people to watch it if they're watching other things. I'm happy Friday Night Lights is renewed even if Fridays does not seem like the best time to put it but I'm hoping NBC will move the show to a different day (maybe for a low rated new series) if it does bad. I'm hoping to catch up on How I Met Your Mother this summer so I'm glad that's renewed as well. I don't usually look forward to new shows until I hear critical and fannish review of them but at the moment I may be checking out Pushing Daises, Private Practice, Gossip Girls and Viva Laughlin because I am a sucker for musicals. We'll see. I'm not heartbroken over the Veronica Mars cancellation because I've been so disappointed with the show lately and it looks like Rob Thomas has not found a way to get the quality back to S1. Oh well, I'll always have my season one DVDs.

It's been kind of a crazy week for me in traveling. I had kind of sucky trip north but in the midst of all of that, I got to go see Hollywood Blvd and see all the stars in beautiful California weather and that made it all worth it. No matter how bad it gets for me, walking outside and knowing I'm in the best place on earth makes me so happy. It's just so great to see people appreciating entertainment including the great impersonators including a Jack Sparrow and Michael Jackson. I went to Six Flags Magic Mountain yesterday which was fun. X, a four dimensional rollercoaster was mindblowing fantastic and gave me great an emotional rush. Definitely my favorite, defying gravity indeed. I went on 6 rollercoasters but unfortunatly, for the first time ever, I got nausous and threw up which kind of ruined the mood for me. I went on one more but eventually decided I couldn't take anymore and saw a bird show. That was fun and I got to be a volunteer and have a parrot land on me and then got a free picture after. It was cool.

Traveling gave me the oppurtunity to watch a lot of Office episodes so I went back and watch a lot of S3 episodes and others to see Pam's character arc. I saw the Pilot, The Dundies, Boys and Girls, Casino Night, Gay Witch Hunt, The Convention, The Coup, Initiation, Business School, Cocktails and of course, Beach Games. It's been a long journey for her. I'll never get tired of seeing these episodes. I'm excited to see the finale even though I know there'll be no new episodes, I just want to know what happens and have some closure for the season. I already have a full summer planned with lots of Office related things to do plus many more Office rewatchings. It's nice to have a show to love with all my heart. 2 more hours until the finale!!! *avoids recent LJ posts*
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Office Day! (and Supernatural) [May. 10th, 2007|06:43 pm]

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[Current Mood |excited]

I am SO excited for tonight's episode. Should be awesome!

From Watch with Kristin: I've just heard from multiple insiders that it's looking very likely that NBC will double the amount of The Office we'll get next season. I'm told it's looking like each episode will expand to be an hourlong; however, if that plan falls through for some reason, I'm hearing that, at the very least, NBC wants to pick up something like 37 episodes of the show in its current half-hour format

Yay! More Office in either case scenario which is a win-win-win situation for me. I'd be happy with either. Now I can't wait til Monday to find out.

Probably too late for tonight's episode but if anyone in the SoCal area wants to watch The Office with me, I'm inviting everyone over for an Office fan meetup. Details:

Date: May 10
Time: 8:30-9:30 (feel free to come early to be safe and stay later to discuss/squee :))
Location: Chapman University
One University Dr
Orange, CA 92866
General Directions

It's in the Henley Hall basement in the media room which is the second residence hall on the left when you enter at the intersection of Walnut Avenue and Center Street.

Date: May 17
Time: 8:00-9:00 (again, coming early/staying late is encouraged)
Same place

And good news to hear about the Friday Night Lights and Supernatural renewals!
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When a fandom fails you, move onto the next one ie Due South Love [May. 5th, 2007|11:40 pm]

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[Current Music |Buffy musical]
[Current Mood |refreshed]

So it seems like me and The Office are having a breakup. I've still watched Women's Appreciation only once, not because it was all that bad but I have a bad feeling about it. I'm pissed off at the characters and the writers and the fact that I have to defend characters who I love even when I'm angry at them but also hurting with them. Yeah obviously I'm talking Michael and Jan here and it's ruining my enjoyment of the show as a whole and I hate that. This is why I don't like to invest myself into a ship too much, especially het ones where the writers can fuck it up. Now I'm hating the show for breaking my heart :( The whole Pam/Jim/Karen triangle is annoying me too although its more of a reaction to being frustrated with the characters.

Even the fact that the show producer is awesome and tried to get fanvids onto the S3 DVDs and even when that failed, still support US the fans, all of this still doesn't erase my negative feelings. And that is bad and wrong. I can't even get myself to watch my favorite episodes. I just have this bad feeling in my gut about it.

So I am distracting myself with some great episodes of Due South. I'm up to Mountie on the Bounty and it was awesome! The love story of Fraser and RayK makes me so happy. The fun part is I see so many images I've seen in vids. Specifically Out Here because I've watched that vid way too many times but I've seen Goodie Two Shoes, Wonder of Birds, In the Mirror and Flying Home clips as well and it's so cool to recognize them and see the context. I have banned myself from watching the vids while I'm watching the show which just makes me want to finish the series even more. And I want to read some good DS fic, read and unread. I love Fraser so much, he is a true hero.

Get out of the closet, Fraser! Spoilers for Due South S2-3 )

So yeah, Due South=Love. I'm hoping to finish the series in the next week or so. I saw Supernatural and loved it for once. Not much to say but oh, Dean. How I love you so even when you tear my heart out. Grey's was pretty boring but made up for it with all the beautiful LA shots. God, I love my city so much. The waves, the landscapes, the city shots, all of it was looking good. Next weekend is my big trip up to Six Flags Magic Mountain where I'm going to spend all day riding some of the biggest, fastest and most thrilling roller coasters out there. Being a HUGE roller coaster fan, I'm super excited. I'm in it for that emotional high and that flying feeling I love so much. I'm also going to this big cats conservation center since they're my favorite animals. It'll be good to see some animals again. Now I only have to survive my last week of classes to get there. At least Monday I get my laptop back! :D
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[Apr. 13th, 2007|10:49 pm]

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[Current Location |San Luis Obispo]
[Current Mood |cheerful]

It's been a great few days and so much had happened that I don't know where to begin. First off yesterday I went to Universal Studios with [ profile] clayangel, [ profile] indybaggins and [ profile] blackstray and had an awesome time. Since Universal produces The Office, I counted all the Office stuff I could find.

1) I was greeted by a speaker doing a promo about the true love that is Dwight/Angela with awesome soundbites like the "my animal deserves a lot of loving" TH. So my Office squee started in full gear.
2) An Office poster on the way to the Citywalk! Steve, Rainn, John, Jenna and BJ look so hot in their suits.
3) On the big screen TV in the amusement park, they played an Office promo! With lots of good moments including Pam falling off her chair in the Dundies and some funny Michael quotes.
4) On the Studio Tour they mentioned that The Office films some stuff here although obviously not the main office building. They also said Steve had shot some Evan Almighty scenes there.
5) There was a huge Office poster on one of the studio buildings. It looked great!

How I love my show. Although I couldn't see it live last night, I made it my mission to watch it and managed to download it after 3 tries that took 3 hours. But it was so worth it! I had low expectations for the episode but the episode made me love my show SO MUCH in that it can be amazing in any scenario. It knows what the show is all about whether it be Michael (can I possibly love him anymore?) or the whole office having fun together. Also I laughed a lot, it had great lines and a little bit of M/Jness. Although I still hate that there's a rerun next week (UGH), I'm really looking for all of the future episodes especially the finale which should be amazing.

In Whose Line news, I met Ryan Stiles!!! And Jeff, Chip and Greg but still RYAN. I saw him when he first got out of the bus at Cal Poly and then I saw the show which was hilarious and sooo slashy. They're all just the best. But after I got to meet Ryan and I got a picture with him and Greg :D He was so nice to me and everyone and yes, so tall. We also got to talk to Ryan's manager so I asked her if Ryan was going to do a show with Colin anytime soon. The exact quotes are fuzzy in my mind but she said that Colin and Ryan are genius together and that they don't have anything scheduled but it was possible. This should all be transcribed later because I'm drawing a blank. But it definitely sounded positive that it would happen sometime. Later I got to talk to Ryan again and told him I loved Whose Line and it always made me laugh and then asked him the same Colin question. He said Colin was doing his own thing with Brad so it was hard for them to do anything together. I'm forgetting what else right now, sorry the squee has overwhelmed my brain. But he did say that him and Colin meet up once every year so at least there's that. It was just so awesome to be able to meet him and talk to him and I'm still in a state of WOW.

Oh and I told Chip I loved him on The Office (as Josh aka King of the Stupid Universe/Poor Man's Michael Scott). I love it when two fandoms collide.

Also, I LOVE California. No matter where I go, it's always beautiful. Drivin up north, the scenery is gorgeous all over the place. Plus the temperature is perfect with sunshine and 70s/high 60s. Still puts a smile on my face :)
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[Mar. 16th, 2007|03:46 pm]

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[Current Mood |awake]

Happy Belated Birthdays to [ profile] fan_eunice, [ profile] hannahrorlove and [ profile] gossipcom! Hope you all had fantastic days :)

Gah, I'm so behind. At least it's felt like that since February 22nd since I went to Escapade and Cocktails came on and then I met The Office cast and Melora and Julian McMahon. Crazy. I don't know how caught up I'll get but we'll see.

I don't have a lot to say about Escapade except that I had a wonderful time. It was AWESOME to see familiar fans again as well as new ones. I had a lot of fun talking to people and listening to panels and watching the amazing vid show. I really needed the break. There's nothing like talking about fandom and vids with people who get it. I left the con feeling really fulfilled and happy with myself which I've been feeling a lot these days. It's definitely nice having a good boost to my self-esteem :)

Good news is its been absolutely beautiful out lately. There is nothing, NOTHING like walking out into 80 degree weather with the bright sun shining down on my face. It just puts a smile on my face no matter how crappy my mood is or what early time in the morning it is. Paradise. Every day I feel blessed and lucky and am so glad I made the best decision of my life to come here.

I finished catching up on Heroes and I've been enjoying it a lot without feeling fannish about it. My problem primarily there is I haven't really connected too much to the characters and relationships beyond caring about them. The plot is what gets me in this show, its so much fun to see what happens next. I love Hiro (of course) and Nathan is my hot guy who I can't help but like because I looooove flying. That scene in 105 was the coolest thing ever. And I like Claire and her father as well.

Currently watching S1 of House and loving it. I really could care less about most of the medical plots but I LOVE House. I got pimped into the show when I met one of the writers, Matt Witton and they showed episodes of it and I couldn't believe how hilarious and smart and awesome House was. At the moment, I'm most enjoying him with Wilson and Cuddy and can definitely see where the slash is coming from. I find Foreman, Cameron and Chase all really boring though but thankfully House has good enough interactions with them that I don't mind. I can't wait to watch Bukowski (ie [ profile] astolat's amazing vid) with context!

Still all about The Office these days. I was feeling pretty bummed the last week about not having episodes for another three weeks but then thankfully some new Michael/Jan spoilers came up and now I feel SO much better and excited for what's to come. I have officially turned into a total spoiler whore for this show. I just can't get enough! It's nice to finally have a fandom to call my own that I can love with all my being. It feels like people feel that way for Supernatural or QaF or whatever other show and I've never really had that. Not since Smallville and that was back in 2002. It's nice to be able to read all the news, spoilers, discussion, fic for my ship (hopefully more in the future), vids, etc and not get tired of it. Not to mention watching episodes as many times as I can. I've watched almost all the episodes 3 times now and my favorites a lot more than that. I can just listen to the show and just be entertained. It definitely helps with vidding. And good news is newpeats on tonight! I can't wait to see some of the new scenes added in.

I'm off to San Diego this weekend so I have no idea how much I'll be around.
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Today is an awesome day. [Feb. 16th, 2007|04:21 pm]

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[Current Music |"Lovin each day" by Ronan Keating]
[Current Mood |happy]

For so many reasons. First of all, happy birthday [ profile] heresluck! I hope you have an awesome day and a great year full of vidding and great food, music, books and tv shows. It was so wonderful to meet you at Vividcon and I am still constantly amazed (and entertained) by your vids. May there be many more to come!

I am still on a high from the last Office episode. I still can't believe this show gets better and better every single week. Not to mention making me love Michael more and more.

The Office: Business School )

Nice to see people loving Michael again. This show just makes me so happy. After I saw this episode, I went to this ice cream social on my floor because I was in such a good mood and believe so much more in *people*. I had a lot of fun too, I gave my Office DVDs to my RA to get her to watch the show and played Spoons with some people which was great. Nothing like an intense card game to make the day better. This month has been SO WONDERFUL because I love almost every day. I like my classes, my work, my friends and my show that always cheers up my day. Not to mention it was a beautiful 80 degrees today :D Life is wonderful. Especially with the weekend here. It makes me so happy knowing that in less than a week I'll be at Escapade! Watching a huge shipper squee episode of The Office and then Grey's Anatomy and Supernatural with fans :D I can't wait to be in a fannish environment again.

Also a HUGE reminder for everyone to sign up for Vividcon this Sunday, February 18th at 1 PM EST/10 AM PST. If you love vidding from watching vids to making vids to reading vid meta, this is the convention for you. I am still reeling from going to Vividcon last year for the first time where I had the time of my life. Seriously, it is that good. I know of nothing to compare to seeing your favorite vidders and vidfans, watching (new) vids on big screen, talking about vids all day long and being in a general fandom-loving, vid-loving environment. It was worth every penny of my money and more. I would definitely recommend staying for as long as you possibly can. If you feel jealous hearing about Vividcon, it probably means you should come. So set your alarms, get your friends to remind you, have a friend sign you up if you can't be at your computer at that time. Just make sure to register early as last year it sold out in about 5 hours and this year it'll probably be sooner. I really, really can't wait for Vividcon now. Is it August yet?

Also? [ profile] sisabet made a new Supernatural vid!!! Go download here It is freaking amazing and heartbreaking and GAH soo good.
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New vid! The Office - Michael/Jan: "This Will Be Our Year" [Feb. 14th, 2007|11:48 pm]

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[Current Mood |accomplished]

Happy Valentine's Day! So I'm a bit late but I have an excuse! I've spent practically the entire day working on a spur of the moment vid. And it's true, vidding really does help calm down obsessions. I'm calm now even though a new episode of The Office is airing tomorrow (YAY). So I love this song and it's reminded me of Michael/Jan for awhile now (originally B/J but works for both) and since I wanted to make a little V-Day gift, here it is. Watching this vid just makes my heart fill with squee for Michael/Jan and I hope it's enjoyed :)

Title: This Will Be Our Year
Music: Ok Go
Source: The Office S1-3
Ship: Michael/Jan

Links: This Will Be Our Year (19 MB Divx avi)

I know lots of people oppose Valentine's Day but I can't help but enjoy it. I believe in love and I like having a holiday to promote it. Not just romantic love but all kinds of love. I want to thank each and every person on my Flist for being so awesome and wonderful and making me love each day a little (and many times a lot) more. Also a lot of love goes out to the California beautiful, sunny 60-80 degree weather which I appreciate SO much more knowing NY and other places are getting so much snow. Still the best decision I've ever made to come here. Here's the Vidder Meme going around:

For Valentine's Day, show six of your favorite vidders some love. You don't have to say much/anything; just put their names down in a list.

[ profile] dualbunny
[ profile] f1renze
[ profile] heresluck
[ profile] laurashapiro
[ profile] sisabet
[ profile] sockkpuppett

That was really hard because there are a lot more. Much love to everyone who makes (good) videos!
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Thursday TV Roundup [Feb. 5th, 2007|07:46 pm]

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[Current Mood |happy]

Happy Birthday [ profile] sisabet and [ profile] coffeeandink! It was great to meet both of you at Vividcon :) Also Happy Belated Birthdays to [ profile] yhlee, [ profile] almostcanon and [ profile] clayangel! Hope you all had great days.

Nothing makes me happier than walking outside into 80 degree, sunshine filled days. It puts a smile on my face whenever I do it, knowing that I'm living the dream when I would have been freezing only a year ago. Second semester has begun and my days are pretty packed from 8-5. The good news is I'm making a lot of money and taking two awesome classes I'm loving, Social Psychology and Cognitive Psychology. So interesting and the professors seem great so far.

I'm still obsessed with The Office and have now rewatched all the episodes twice. I'm planning a third rewatching as well. It's just SO GOOD and I am completely in love with all the characters (except Andy). The show makes me so happy with Michael always making me smile. I've been watching a bunch of vids for it and found two that were well edited and wonderful here: with Love Machine being fast paced and fun and Lovin' Each Day being super cute, funny Jim/Pam goodness. Since I've been in a comedy mood, I've been rewatching Arrested Development and I think although both shows are about equal in quality, The Office has been more successful because of its ability to fully love and relate to the characters as well as having a big ship that people can get behind. I tried 30 Rock but didn't find it that funny and I'm beginning Scrubs now which I have yet to form an opinion on yet. And I'm still continuing to watch Gilmore Girls and Due South, both which I still enjoy very much.

Thursday night is definitely the best night of the week with The Office, Supernatural and Grey's Anatomy.

The Office - Ben Franklin )

Supernatural: Playthings through Houses of the Holy )

Grey's Anatomy - Wishin and Hopin )

Is it Thursday yet?
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The Office *squee* [Jan. 17th, 2007|10:11 pm]

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[Current Mood |giggly]

OMG I love The Office! I was merely enjoying it yesterday and now it has blown into fullblown, addicted completely must watch every episode, love every character and relationship and makes me LMAO ALL the time, full fannish glee. I am so amazed by it, the acting, writing and cinematography (the camera is a character!) is all so well done. It's almost equal to Arrested Development in its brilliance. Maybe it is, I have to go back and watch AD to compare. But anyway, wow. I have never laughed so hard in my life for some of these moments and it does it in such a unique way. I love how the show mixes both the outrageous and normal, the cruel and the kind, the happy and the heartbreaking.

And yeah, I love Michael. I know he's horrible and can be such an idiot and say the worst things...but I can't help but adore him. He tries so hard, it's so obvious how desperate he is for others to like him, to be his friend and yet he has no idea how to go about it which further isolates him. It kills me, it really does. But then he does the cutest things with kids or with trying to defend his office family, I love it. Steve Carell is made of awesome; I saw him in Little Miss Sunshine again today (LOVE!) and he was amazing. But anyways, his relationship with Dwight is particularly hilarious (they both have that neediness to them that so works with them) and I have grown to love Dwight more than I ever thought I would. His geekiness is too cute. Speaking of cute, Jim and Pam are made of it and too adorable. I wouldn't say I ship them but I certainly like them together. I love them both, but Roy and Katie were the worst choices of boyfriend/girlfriend that I have ever seen. Especially Roy, I can't understand sticking with a guy who would treat you like that. But anyway, I adore all the secondary characters too and I absolutely love the family moments between them even with all their issues with each other. And I have this strange attraction to Michael/Jan but more in a push/pull "I can't believe I'm doing this" kind of way.

Seriously, so much LOVE for this show. I've marathoned the entire S2 from 204 today and just saw 301 which was made of awesome and OMG so funny. I am dying to see more but sadly reached my sendspace limit and bittorrent is not working. Argh. I totally rec this show to everyone though and if by chance you know of any good vids to it, link me up.

In other news, I'm officially going to see Greg Proops and Wayne Brady in Largo (in LA- *loves CA*) on January 24th. Can't wait! Now I will have seen all of the main Whose Line members in a span of three months. Niice. Which btw, Whose Line was mentioned on The Office! Michael said he learned all his improv skills from the best, "Drew Carey and Ryan Stiles". Now the first, while wrong, works for Michael but I was all happy with the Ryan mention. And as an added bonus, Chip Esten was in two episodes. That was awesome. Oh and there was even a Queer as Folk mention..."Queer as Fuck". Hahaha.,
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Beach trip, coping mechanisms, Queer as Folk, Whose Line and why I vid versus fic [Jan. 16th, 2007|02:20 pm]

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[Current Mood |contemplative]

Happy Birthday [ profile] laurashapiro and [ profile] ringwrench! I hope you both have wonderful days full of joy, fannish goodies and cake :)

Last Tuesday I celebrated the last 80 degrees day here by going down to Long Beach for the first time. It was really nice, I loved the marina and the downtown area was great. Plus I went swimming even though the water was freezing since I've never gotten the chance to do so in the ocean in January. It was a very Veronica Mars moment. Even with the recent cold front which hasn't been that bad considering I can handle 60's and tolerate 50s. Still loving that I have tons of free time and can do whatever I want with it. Also a book rec, Rainbow Boys by Alex Sanchez. I randomly started reading it in a library in Buffalo after using the internet because it had three cute boys on the cover and I figured I might as well slash them. Turns out I didn't need to (which is easily seen by the title but I didn't notice that) and it was a very good book about three gay teens trying to deal with their lives. I had a lot of fun finding parallels to Queer as Folk as there are a bunch of them. There's Nelson, a combination of Emmett and Michael with the PFLAG mom and crush on his best friend, Kyle. Kyle's a much toned down version of Justin with the coming out issues who has a crush on Jason who is not Brian (sadly) but more like a good version of Chris Hobbes (although his family has some Brian issues). It's a fun read, I really enjoyed it.

New Coping Mechanisms:

Get fully invested in watching the entire Chargers game only to see them lose heartbreakingly Whose Line. (No more football for me)
Feel down or bored or angry (most recently at a Smallville promo that made me want to throw word: Clana) Whose Line.

Replacing Whose Line with The Office or Gilmore Girls works well to. Laughing really does help a lot. I am loving The Office with Michael just being hilarious with his horrible social skills and bad jokes. Best comedy I've seen since Arrested Development and I love the camera work. Supernatural and Grey's Anatomy are still awesome on Thursday nights, I don't really have much to say that hasn't been already said.

On a Queer as Folk note, my personal awards as I go through the episodes in future vid work:

My favorites under the cut )

More reasons Colin Mochrie is made of awesome: not only are three of his favorite TV shows Buffy, Angel and Firefly (can't get much better than that), his favorites are: The musical episode and "Hush" are my favorite Buffy's. The Angel episode where he turns into a Muppet is fun and all of the Firefly episodes. I would have loved to have been a funny vampire on Buffy. Yay for the musical and all of Firefly, of course :)

Whose Line ramblings under the cut )

Oh and I wrote some fic! Whose Line, Ryan/Colin. I've written some other fics at times but have never finished or published any online. It reminded me though why I stick with vids love is to see is the Colin and Ryan show, all improv between them ALL the time. It'd be pure heaven, loads of slash I'm sure and too funny. I really think they are the best at improv in terms of laughabiliand not fic. For one, I'm just not that interested in writing fic as I don't get a lot of ideas and don't find it really enjoyable. It's nice once in awhile though. My biggest problem, especially with fanfic, is that I find it really hard to write the characters. I always feel like the characters when I write them are one dimensional and almost always OOC. I feel I put too much of myself into fics and it doesn't come out as the unique characters. I also find it hard to express what I see in my head and that really, really frustrates me, being a perfectionist. I read so many other amazing fics and I would love to write like them but realistically, it's just not going to happen. And I know practice makes perfect and all that but I'm not all that interested in doing so. I hate taking an idea that I love so much and writing it and then feeling like it's crap and I did what I imagined an injustice. I'd much rather spend my time vidding, trying to be the best vidder I can be and making vids that I enjoy and am proud of and can parse reasonably well how good they are and ways to get better. I'm much more of an idea person anyways, I like making connections and drawing parallels and juxtapositions in the text instead of making up new things. Which I do enjoy but usually more in a imagination sense, another reason why I enjoy reading fic so much more than writing.

The thing is, I get into a show when I love the source. For all my fandoms, I love the characters and the relationships and the storylines and I want to show why I love it so much. That's why I love vidding so much, to visually show why I love it and usually the specific parts I really enjoy. A lot of times my favorite ideas and vids to watch are explorations of a character through a relationship since that's one of my favorite things about shows. My favorite fics are often the same thing and the more interesting takes on characters and meta on the show are usually where my interest lies. But a key difference in why I read fic is because I want to see something that was never shown on screen and often not possible to show. That's why I most read slash when I read fic, because I see a lot of het onscreen (and in RL) that I don't need to see as much of it unless a pairing really grabs me and leaves me wanting more.

This is why even though I LOVE Brian/Justin from Queer as Folk, I barely read any fic for them because I don't feel a need to. I got so much of what I wanted onscreen, so much romance and love portrayed in so many ways that I don't really need the fic. But because I got so much onscreen, it makes me want to vid it a LOT because there's so much to show especially in terms of the ever interesting Brian Kinney. Contrast that with Whose Line which, because of the nature of the show, gets almost no dramatic storylines at all which I love. So I'm shipping a slash pairing that I see so many of the classic romantic, sexual, friendship signs from, even getting kisses along the way, but yet I never see any classic plots. It leaves me always wanting more, of the ship and of the *real* story of them, the dramatics and angst and romance. Everything. And because it doesn't look like there'll ever be a happy ending (for what I want), my need will never be satisfied which always drives me wanting more fic of any kind. It's a much harder show to vid for that very same reason, so many of the things I wish I could vid happened offscreen so I must make do with what I have and through fic.

In conclusion, Dean yay, vidding! (I swear I'll have a new one out this week),
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Update [Jan. 8th, 2007|08:12 pm]

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[Current Mood |bouncy]
[Current Music |"Wanna be loved" by dc talk]

Happy (belated) Birthday [ profile] corliamat! Hope you had a great day :)

I am SO glad I am back in California! It's so perfect out, 60-80 all week and it feels heavenly. Today it was 80 (in January!) with a breeze and I was in paradise. After that freezing winter break, I am ever so thankful and back to being completely in love with California. Ashley/California OTP! I'm playing tennis this month and it's so good to play again. My game isn't too rusty so I'm able to hold my own in games. I still can't fathom playing outside in January, it's beyond awesome. This is what I dreamed of all last year and I finally did it :D

It's so nice too to have so much free time and to be able to do whatever I want. Especially weekends where I have absolutely nothing to do. So far I've perused my Flist endlessly, got up to 3x14 in Gilmore Girls, vidded a lot, read fic and a bunch of other things. Not to mention, I've reeally been enjoying having my own room. It's so nice not to have to worry about another person and just do my own thing.

Have I mentioned that I love California?
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I love the internet [Dec. 16th, 2006|10:49 am]

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[Current Music |"Gravity" by Embrace]
[Current Location |LAX]
[Current Mood |bouncy]

Happy Birthday [ profile] way2busymom! I'll be forever thankful for you getting [ profile] sockkpuppett into Supernatural :)

I love the internet SO much. So much that I paid for all day internet access here at LAX. I made a mistake in times so I have a few hours to kill before I leave to go back to NY. So I will enjoy watching/listening to vids, checking my Flist and surfing aimlessly, yay! Have I mentioned that I am sooo happy that finals are over and that I finally have a break to do whatever I want? I've been dyying to vid and now I finally have the time. It's beyond awesome. And a couple weeks ago I splurged and bought a new hard drive, two in fact since it was such a good deal. So now I have 750 GB not counting my 400 GB with laptop and other external hard drive combined. It's like paradise now that I can vid so many fandoms at once. Also, thanks so everyone who left such awesome gifts in my stocking. I would looove to have them all.

I am ridiculously happy now upon finding out that Ryan Stiles is coming to California! To do improv with Greg, Jeff and Chip although sadly not Colin but I will still go out and see him anyway. And its amazing to have so many Whose Line fans coming out with me from Clay, Indy, Sue, Lyndsey and even more all coming out to CA-it's just like our own mini WL con. I'm going to at least the Ventura one, maybe the San Luis Obispo one and heading up north for the Carmel and Santa Cruz ones (April 11-14 respectively). I cannot wait! Should be lots and lots of fun and awesome to finally get to meet people.
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[Dec. 1st, 2006|11:37 pm]

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[Current Music |SPN vids]
[Current Mood |cheerful]

So I am having a very good week. Everything just seems to be coming together.

-The sun is shining and its warm outside. And its Decemember! Hee, it never gets old. It was actually really windy on Wednesday which I wouldn't mind if it wasn't freezing. Disappointing California, disappointing. But I'm not afraid to use my winter coat. Luckily it didn't come to snowpants. I suppose I should feel bad for the snow and cold that apparently other parts of the country are experiencing. *thinks about my 18 years of cold winters* Nope, I don't think so. *gloats*
-I finished my big essay! And it didn't suck. My perfectionist side is happy and I'm glad and relieved its done. Now I just have to get through the next two weeks of finals and papers but I think I can do it. And in one of my classes I can even make a vid for my final project :) And in another essay I can do poetry so it's looking up on the academic front.
-Christmas is coming! I love the cheerfulness of the holiday season. I can't wait to see my cats again not to mention my friends and parents. And get them to buy me things. I actually bought a cheap printer/copier/scanner and relented in finally getting a cell phone as presents for myself on Black Friday. And speaking of presents, [ profile] charmax made me some vidding icons that I love madly. Vidding icons, yay!
-Speaking of vidding, I can't wait to be able to vid! It's killing me to not have the time. My space is running out on my hard drive as I have *counts them* 4 fandoms heavily represented on there (mostly in DVD format, whole episodes). And I want to squeeze in another one. Is it Decemember 17th yet?
-I'm still behind on a few shows but I'm nearing the end of BSG S2 (Lay Down Your Burdens Pt1) and I am still loving the show. I can't wait to have time to watch more shows. My current schedule of shows I want to watch completely by the end of January (after BSG):

1) Due South (I'm on the 1x12, I think)
2) Stargate Atlantis (I'm on 1x15ish)
3) The OC (2x16ish), Lost (2x06ish, watching mostly because of Nathan/obsessed friend), Wonderfalls (1x03ish) *I have no idea what order I'm watching these in but I want to get them caught up/finished
4) Farscape (I want to understand those vids!)
5) Hopefully I'll have sometime to rewatch some BtVS, AtS and SPN episodes

If you don't know by now, I have a high tolerance for TV shows. If you doubt me, I watched Laguna Beach and didn't completely hate it (which in my defense, I only watched for the pretty California shots). This holds true for a lot of things including music, books/fanfic and movies but except for music, I am decidingly more picky with the latter two these days. This is really helpful in that I'm also slightly spoiler phobic. I find it enhances my viewing experience when I don't have any advance idea of what happens except for a preview or two. Which is not helpful for vid watching as I don't like being visually spoiled much either. Which is why I plan to watch a lot of shows and why having a lot of vids in a fandom motivates me to want to watch the show. I like to actually understand what's going on in the vids.

This leads me to the always helpful posts where vidders post commentary on awesome vids making me really, really happy. Go watch, read and feedback!
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Thanks [Nov. 23rd, 2006|06:19 pm]

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[Current Mood |grateful]

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Also Happy Birthday to [ profile] melina123 and Happy Belated Birthdays to [ profile] cereta and [ profile] tinamishi!

I am so much more thankful today than I was last year and that makes me incredibly happy. It's my first Thanksgiving in California and I spent it with some relatives I have around here who were nice and provided good food and football watching. I'm thankful for everyday waking up to feel warm sunshine in my face and for being in the beautiful state of California. I'm thankful for being out of high school and in college where freedom, learning, creativity and kindness reign. I'm thankful for being away from my parents but having a much better relationship with them because of it. I'm thankful for my cats who I miss ridiculously but who I just appreciate more. I'm thankful for all the friends I have, from the ones I talk to everyday to the ones I talk to once and awhile to the ones in my past. I'm thankful for my precious laptop and iPod and all of the wonderful books, music, tv, movies and other things I have available to me. I am oh so thankful to the internet that allows me to connect with so many people and find out so much information. I'm thankful for fandom, for vidding and vids, for ships and fic and for this amazing community we have here. I'm thankful to be alive, to be more independent and to have an idea of who I am and who I want to be.

That's what life is all about.

A meme in the spirit of the holiday: Comment with your username and I will tell you why I'm thankful to have you on my flist. Or just thankful for you in general. And then post in your own journal if you would like to share the thankfulness! (If you wish to opt out on this part, it's quite alright.)
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[Nov. 11th, 2006|11:31 pm]

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[Current Mood |good]

Happy Birthday to [ profile] sweetestdrain! It was great to meet and talk to you at Vividcon :) Also belated Happy Birthdays to [ profile] vagabondage, [ profile] astartexx, [ profile] fairshare, [ profile] sarah_p and [ profile] ckll!

So Bascon was lots of fun. I definitely needed that (although not the hellish transportation experience but I'm trying to forget about that). It was so wonderful to see some people from Vividcon (including [ profile] permetaform, [ profile] lierduoma, [ profile] laurashapiro, [ profile] morgandawn, [ profile] fashes, [ profile] paraviondeux and [ profile] falzalot) again, have lots of vidtalk and see a vid show. The panels were all interesting and fun to listen to (I did say a few things so yay courage!) with my favorites probably being the Supernatural and Race in Fandom ones. And Vid Review of course. Part of my goal for the con was to not miss Vividcon as much (9 more months!) and it did help to get some fannish and vidtalk interaction. Also I checked out San Francisco which I loved, very different feel from LA but lots of cool things to see like the Golden Gate Bridge, Fisherman's Wharf and Union Square. Now I can't wait for Escapade in February :)

I voted for the first time last Tuesday in beautiful California *loves state some more* I'll forgive you even if you did reelect Schwarzenegger. More importantly, Democrats won the House and Senate! Yay! Normally I hate politics because I despise the hatefulness, bashing and dishonesty that goes on for both sides and it often depresses me of the state of the nation. But I've been so happy and optimistic about it lately and have actually read some news articles about it. It's just a refreshing change from 2004 when reading my Flist depressed me and now I'm just bathing in the positive. The bipartisan spirit that's going on gives me so much hope. I really am an idealist at heart.

At my college, during them month of January we have an interterm where you can take a course, travel or just stay home. I'm definitely staying in California as there's NO WAY on earth I'd deal with a month of cold weather since that's why I came here in the first place. Besides this is home although I will admit that I like my parents a LOT more when I'm away from them (especially when they send money hehe). Also, my roommate is staying home so if any of you want to come down to SoCal and stay with me (for FREE), consider yourself invited :) Anyways during January, I've decided on just taking tennis and no academic course as I really need a break from the academic obligations. But I'm totally making up my own course which will be Vidding 101 otherwise known as heaven. I even made up a description for it!

Vidding 101: This course explores vidding through a variety of methods, both theoretical and applied. Traditional reading selections will include material on film theory and aesthetics, editing, color and movement, music, narrative theory, rhetoric and other applicable topics. Internet readings include a wide range of vid meta that more directly addresses the topic. Theoretical readings will be applied to viewings of a wide variety of vids, from a diverse selection of fandoms and vidders. Written responses include both short and long feedback, vid recs with descriptions, personal reflections on vidding, commentary on personal work and original vid meta writings. Siginificant time will be spent vidding to vids in different stages of development and applying concepts learned to the vids in progress. Other supplemental activities include watching shows that vids are made from to understand the context and improve the general vid watching experience.

I'm so excited! *looks forward to January* Ok, here's the Six Random Facts Meme as I was tagged by [ profile] dualbunny and [ profile] maddie508
Once tagged by this entry, the assignment is to write a blog entry of some kind with six random facts about yourself. Then, pick six of your friends and tag them; no tag backs. This explanation should be included. I'm not tagging anyone, do it if you'd like.

1. My most precious possessions is my laptop, video iPod and external hard drive. I'd save them first from a fire anytime.
2. I can be very absentminded and lose a lot of things. This semester I've lost my room key twice and my mailbox three times although I found it two of those times.
3. Ridiculous is my favorite word. Because it's fun to say and because the entire "Ridiculously Romantic" B/J scene is my favorite scene ever. Second goes to California as I love saying it and being here.
4. I have a hard time coming up with things at the top of my head which is making this meme hard for me. I like to read things and then make connections to my own life (which I believe is my Ne ie extroverted intuition showing).
5. I love sports such as football, basketball (just found out my favorite player, Hakin Warrick is doing well!), soccer, tennis (Roger Federer and Peter Sampras are my favorite players), skiing (what I'm doing Thanksgiving weekend at Big Bear or Mammoth) and ice skating which I'm going to do next Thursday. I love that adrenaline rush.
6. I am still hopelessly behind. My problem is I set a big task ahead of me and don't allow myself to do other work before that but then just procrastinate on doing it by doing fun stuff. Le sigh.

Off to reply to posts and watch Firefly. I love Saturdays.
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