*pets* You know what you need? You need to come to Canada with us and see live shows. Or to hang out in California with us because sunshine and beach and Disneyland and all that. *nods seriously*

And if it helps at all, I think everyone has that self-hatred feeling inside. I know I do. And it's SO hard to have good friends, or to find a connection with your family. I think we all are here- online, in fandom etc. because the real world doesn't always give us enough.